Izingane Ezingabantu Abadala Zomama AbakwaNarcissistic Zingakugwema Kanjani Ukuwa Okungokomzwelo Lolu Suku Lomama

Yimiphi I-Movie Okufanele Uyibone?
 

Usuku lomama luyeza maduze emazweni amaningi, okusho ukuthi omama emhlabeni wonke bazogujwa ngezimbali, amabhulashi amahle, nezipho ezisuka enhliziyweni.



Abantu abaningi balubheke ngabomvu lolu suku, njengoba lubanikeza ithuba lokugubha owesifazane owabaletha emhlabeni futhi wabanika uthando nokusekelwa okungenamibandela.

Okwe izingane zomama abathandanayo (NMs), yisimo esihluke kakhulu impela.



Esikhundleni sokubheka phambili kulolu suku njengethuba lokukhombisa umzali othandekayo ukuthi bathandwa futhi baziswa kangakanani, ingane endala yomuntu umama we-narcissistic ingaqala amasonto athusayo - ngisho nezinyanga - ngaphambili.

Laba ngabantu abaye bahlukunyezwa ngezinhlobo ezimbi kakhulu zokuhlukunyezwa ngokwengqondo, ngokwengqondo, nangokwasemzimbeni kusuka kumuntu oyedwa obekufanele bakwazi ukwethemba: umama wabo.

Ukushaywa Komama

Siphila emphakathini obeka ukuba ngumama esisekelweni esikhulu.

Manje, ukuba ngumzali kuyalahlwa ngokuzikhandla, futhi omama abavamile ukuthola ukuqinisekiswa nokwazisa okubafanele.

Kodwa kunenkolelo eyisisekelo yokuthi ngokushesha nje lapho owesifazane eba ngumama, uhlala ephana, enobungcwele egcwele uthando olungenamibandela nokuzinikela.

Akakwazi ukwenza okungalungile, futhi uma enza kanjalo, kungenxa 'yesizathu esihle,' futhi ufanelwe ukuthethelelwa ngokushesha. Ngemuva kwakho konke, 'ungumama wakho.'

Olunye lwezinkinga ezinzima kakhulu izingane ze-NM okumele zilwe nazo iqiniso lokuthi zazingakholelwa kaningi ngalokho okwenzeka ngasese.

Kungani kunjalo? Kakhulu ngoba ama-NM ajwayele ukuba nobuso bomphakathi obuhluke kakhulu kulokho okuboniswa ekhaya.

Emphakathini, amalungu omndeni akhulisiwe, abangane, othisha, njll. Umama uziveza njengomuntu ozinikele ngokuphelele futhi onothando.

Angakhuluma ngendlela aziqhenya ngayo ngezingane zakhe, angazigona noma aziphulule ukuze akhombise bonke abantu abaseduze kwakhe ukuthi ungumzali ophelele, omuhle kangakanani… futhi lapho nje umndeni usekhaya, uzokhipha inzondo ne-vitriol nganoma yikuphi okubonakalayo okuncane.

Ngokuphambene nobungcwele obuvame ukuhlotshaniswa nokuba ngumama, futhi kulimaze ngendlela emangalisayo izingane ezincane, ezisengozini ekunakekeleni kwakhe.

'Kodwa Ungumama Wakho!'

Abantu abangakhulanga nomzali othanda ukusebenzisa izidakamizwa bathambekele ekuphatheni kabi lapho labo abazame ukuveza ukuphelelwa kwabo yithemba ngokukhuliswa kwabo.

Eqinisweni, lapho abanye abantu abadala abasinda ekuhlukunyezweni ngumzali ngokuzama ukuchazela abanye ukuthi kungani kufanele baziqhelelanise nomzali oshiwo, noma babatshele ngezinto ezihlasimulisayo ababhekane nazo, bavame ukuhlangana nokungakholwa noma ubutha.

Ngezinye izikhathi zombili.

Omunye umuntu anganikeza izimpendulo ze-glib njenge “Kodwa ungumama wakho! NGEQINISO uyakuthanda, futhi uyazi nawe ukuthi uyamthanda, ekujuleni kwenhliziyo yakhe ”.

Noma bangahlikihla isipiliyoni ngokuphelele, nge “O, bekungeke kube kubi kangako. Mhlawumbe wawusabela ngokweqile ngoba wawuyingane ezwelayo. ”

Ngeke baze babone ukuthi lolu hlobo lwempendulo lungalimaza kanjani.

wwe hell in a cell imiphumela 2017

Umuntu okhule nomama owabagcizelela umchilo ongapheli wokugxekwa nonya, ngubani kukhanyiswe igesi njalo futhi kwabenza bangabaza izinkumbulo zabo, ingqondo yabo, akusiye umuntu ozoba nesifiso sokugijimela esitolo ukuze athole izimbali nekhadi.

Impela, bangakwenza lokho ngenxa yesibopho, kepha izimbali ziyohlala ziluhlobo olungalungile noma umbala ongafanele, imizwa esekhadini ayisoze yalunga, futhi ingane ingahle ikhunjuzwe nokuthi ayifunwa ukuqala.

Lokho akucabangeki kahle kumuntu othole uthando oluningi nokusekelwa okuvela kubazali bakhe, kepha abanakubekwa icala ngalokho.

Cishe akunakwenzeka ukuthi umuntu aqonde ngokweqiniso isimo aze azibonele yena uqobo ... yingakho-ke, uma uyingane endala kaMama waseNarcissistic, kufanele ube ngummeli wakho ongcono kakhulu njengomvikeli wakho, nomondli.

Ngaphezu kwakho konke okunye, udinga ukunakekela .

Ukubaluleka Kokuzinakekela

Njengoba wazi kangcono kunanoma ubani omunye ukuthi umama wakho angakuphatha kanjani ngosuku noma ngosuku lukaMama, ungahlunga izindlela zokuzinakekela ezizokusebenzela kangcono.

Uma ungazange uxhumane naye - okungenye yezindlela ezinhle kakhulu ze- ukuphulukiswa ekuhlukunyezweni kwe-narcissistic - lapho-ke umzali wakho angazama ukuxhumana nawe “ngosuku lwakhe olukhethekile” ukuze akucasule futhi azame ukuphinde azinze empilweni yakho.

Ungakulwa nalokhu ngokuvimbela kuqala inombolo yakhe yocingo (uma ungakakwenzi), futhi umvimbe kuma-social media.

Ungaqinisekisa futhi ukuthi noma yimaphi ama-imeyili athunyelwe nguye azofakwa kungobo yomlando ngokushesha kunokuba avele ebhokisini lakho lokungenayo.

Uma ewuhlobo lokuthumela izinkawu ezindizayo ngemuva kwakho ngoba ecabanga ukuthi uzoziphatha ngendlela afuna ngayo uma abanye abantu bebandakanyeka ukukuhlukumeza, kunendlela enhle yokuthola nalokho.

Okweviki noma okungaphambi koSuku Lomama (kanye namasonto ambalwa emva kwalokho), ungaphenduli izingcingo ezivela kunoma ubani ogama lakhe nenombolo yakhe ongalazi.

Thatha ikhefu kokuxhumana nomphakathi, phendula kuphela ama-imeyili asebenza nalawo avela kubangani abaseduze, bese uchitha isihogo sesikhathi esiningi wenza izinto ezikuthokozisayo.

Ukugwema i-TV nakho kuwumqondo omuhle, ngoba cishe uzogcwala izikhangiso zonke ngezinto ezimangazayo ezenzeka ngoSuku Lomama.

Amasayithi okusakaza afana ne-Netflix noma i-Acorn kufanele alunge, kepha uma futhi lapho ubona isikhangiso sosuku lwenhlekelele, yeqa noma usithulise futhi ugxile kokuhlala ukhona.

Yenza izivivinyo zokuphefumula ezimbalwa uma lezi zinto zikudala, futhi uma uzwa umuzwa wecala noma ukwesaba, zama ukukuyeka. Buyela esikhungweni.

Uma uzizwa ucindezeleke ngempela futhi ukhathazekile ngosuku oluzayo, finyelela kulabo abakunethiwekhi yakho yokuxhumana nabantu abakuqondayo oke wadlula kukho futhi abangakunika ukusekelwa.

Uma unezingane zakini nazo ezathola ulaka lwe-NM yakho, ungazama ukuba khona lapho ninikezana amandla, ninikeze amandla nokwesekwa njengoba kudingeka.

Ngaphandle kwalokho, uma ungakatholi umelaphi ogxile ekusebenzeni nabantu asebeke babhekana nabo ukuhlukunyezwa kwe-narcissistic , kuwumqondo omuhle ukuyithola.

Bangakusiza ukwakha ukuzethemba kwakho, futhi bangasiza ekuqinisekiseni okwenzekile, futhi bakufundise imikhuba engakusiza ukuthi ubhekane nomonakalo waphakade.

Amanye ama-psychotherapists wamandla angakufundisa nokuthi ungayisusa kanjani imizwelo emibi nezinkumbulo emzimbeni wakho ukuze ube nethuba lokuphola kubo ngokuphelele.

Qaphela: Uma ukhathazeke ngobuqotho ngokuthi umama wakho angavela emnyango wakho azokusabisa (nomndeni wakho), bese uya kuleyo mpelasonto.

Bhuka igumbi lehhotela noma i-AirBnB, noma ubone ukuthi ungayichitha yini impelasonto nabantu obathandayo. Isihogo, bhuka indiza uye kwelinye izwe uma ukwazi.

lapho owesifazane eshiya indoda ayithandayo

Unelungelo nemvume yokwenza noma yini edingekayo ngenhlalonhle yakho.

Ungahle uthande (i-athikili iyaqhubeka ngezansi):

Yenza Usuku Ngawe Kunalokho

Uma ungumzali, ungasebenzisa lolu suku ukugubha impumelelo yakho enhle yokuba ngumzali futhi ube nesikhathi esihle sekhwalithi nezingane zakho. Noma, uma unabalingani bezilwane esikhundleni salokho, ligubhe nabo!

Noma ungenazo izingane noma izilwane ezifuywayo, ungaphinda uhlele kabusha ukusabela kwakho kuze kube yilolu suku ngokwenza kube yinto enhle kuwe.

Njengoba kungenzeka ukuthi bekufanele ube ngumzali wakho impilo yakho yonke, ungasebenzisa lolu suku njengethuba lokubungaza ukubaluleka kwakho.

Ufanele uthando nokukhanya okungaka, futhi akekho noyedwa ofanele uthando lwakho ukudlula wena. Ikakhulu ngakho konke okwedlule.

Yini ekujabulisa kakhulu? Uyakujabulela ukuchitha isikhathi emvelweni? Ukwenza uhlobo oluthile lobuciko? Ukudansa? Ukudweba ubumba?

Noma ngabe 'indawo yakho ejabulisayo' ifaka umata we-yoga netiye eliluhlaza okotshani noma usofa onethezekile nezikhathi ezimbalwa ku-Netflix, unelungelo lokuzitika nganoma yini okudingeka uyenze ukuguqula lolu suku olumnyama lube ngolunye lwenjabulo, uthando , futhi ngaphezu kwakho konke, ukuthula .

Isiko Lokukusiza Uphulukise

Uma uzwa ukuthi kunezinto obukade ufuna ukuzisho kumama wakho, kepha wazi ukuthi ubengeke aziqonde noma azivume, zibhale ephepheni noma uzithayiphe: noma yikuphi okuthandayo.

Chitha onke amagama ashiywe engashiwongo, konke ukulimala, konke ukukhashelwa.

Uma konke sekuphumile, iya endaweni lapho ungabeka khona umlilo ngokuphepha, bese ufaka leyo ncwadi emalangabini omlilo.

Uma uthanda, ungashisa nezithombe noma ezinye izikhumbuzo ozwa sengathi zibambe uhlobo oluthile lokuqina kwamandla, futhi njengoba yonke into iwela intuthu nomlotha, gxila enhlosweni yakho yokuvumela bonke lobo buhlungu obudala buphele kanye nabo.

Lesi senzo somzimba sokuyekelela siyi-cathartic enkulu, futhi ungagxila ekugcwaliseni umzimba wakho ngothando olukhanyayo nolungenamibandela.

(Yibe-ke unesibopho futhi uqiniseke ukuthi umlilo ucisha ngokuphepha. Isibopho nakho konke…)

Okulandelayo, gcwalisa ikhaya lakho ngamakha othola ukuthi yehlisa umoya, noma ngabe ukushisa impepho noma ukusabalalisa owoyela abalulekile. Ikhaya lakho liyindawo yakho engcwele: isisekelo sakho sokuzola. Lapho, uphephile. Kuphephile.

Yenze i-Fortress of Solace yakho.

Ngemuva kwalokho, geza.

Hhayi ukugeza, okuzokumboza ngamanzi, kepha ishawa esiza ukugeza ukunganaki emzimbeni wakho.

Ama-movie we-kim soo-hyun nezinhlelo ze-tv

Ungenza ngisho nokukhuhla usawoti noma ikhofi ngenkathi ulapho, njengoba isenzo somzimba sokukhipha amafutha singagcizelela isithombe somqondo sokususa izingqimba ezindala zokulimala ukuze uqhamuke kabusha.

Zama Ukuthethelela, Uma Ungakwenza

Uyayikhumbula inkulumo ethi 'bathethelele, ngoba abazi abakwenzayo'? Lokho empeleni kuneqiniso uma kukhulunywa ngabakwa-narcissists.

Noma zingadala umonakalo ongakajwayeleki, kubalulekile ukukhumbula ukuthi ngokoqobo abakwazi ukuqonda ukuziphatha kwabo.

Abakwazi ukukubona.

I-narcissism ukuphazamiseka kobuntu njengokuphazamiseka komngcele, okuvame ukuba nezimbangela zayo ekuhlukunyezweni kwengane.

Isisho esithi “ukulimaza abantu sigcina silimaze abanye abantu” sizwakala siyiqiniso: umama owakulimaza kungenzeka naye walimala ngesikhathi eseyingane… nalabo abamlimazayo kungenzeka ukuthi nabo bahlukunyezwa. Kanjalo njalonjalo, ngesihluku nokulimaza izizukulwane zangemuva.

Intethelelo ayiqondene nokuthethelela omunye umuntu wecala, futhi akusikho nokusula isileti ukuze nina nobabili niqhubekele phambili nobudlelwano obucwebezelayo obujabulile enikade niphupha ngokuba nabo.

Cha, ukuthethelelwa kulesi simo kumayelana nokusika izintambo ezindala ezikugcine uboshwe kumuntu ongeke ayeke ukukulimaza, ukuze ukhululeke, futhi uzisebenzele uzelaphe.