Akubona bonke ubudlelwano bezothando obuhlala unomphela. Eqinisweni, iningi alikwenzi lokho.
Futhi lokho kulungile.
Akufanele sizishaye thina ngokwethu mayelana nobudlelwano sebufikile ekugcineni, njengoba ukwehluleka kobudlelwano akusho ukuthi sehlulekile.
Bonke ubuhlobo esinabo busibumba futhi busifundise, kanjalo nempumelelo ngendlela yayo.
Awukwazi ukulawula ikusasa. Akusibo bonke ubudlelwano onabo obuzodalelwa ukuthi buhlale unomphela, kepha bangamangalisa ngenkathi behlala.
Kepha uma uphupha ngokuba nobudlelwano obuhlala isikhathi eside futhi buhlala unaphakade nosuku, kungasiza ukuqonda izizathu eziyinhloko zokuthi kungani ubudlelwano obuningi buphela.
Ukuzijwayeza lokhu kungakusiza ukuthi ubone izimpawu zesexwayiso kusenesikhathi, ukuze uzame ukufaka izimbobo ebudlelwaneni obungacwila ngenye indlela, noma mhlawumbe ugweme ukuzibandakanya ebudlelwaneni obungahle bube bufushane, futhi ongazisindisa ngakho ubuhlungu benhliziyo obuzayo.
ubekhulelwe ngempela uRachel kubangani
Lezi ngezinye zezizathu eziyisisekelo, eziyisisekelo zokuthi kungani ubudlelwano buhluleka.
1. Awufanelani nje.
Njengoba iminyaka ihamba futhi uchitha isikhathi esithe xaxa ebudlelwaneni, izinto ezazibonakala zingabalulekile noma zaziyindida futhi zikhanga lapho uqala ukuthandana nothile zingaqala ukuba nemifantu ezisekelweni.
Uma ubuntu bakho nezinhlamvu zakho awahambisani , ungaqala ukwenza omunye nomunye angajabuli ngokuphelele.
Lokho, kunjalo, akusho ukuthi udinga ukuba nobuntu obufanayo.
Sonke siyazi ukuthi lokho kuphikisana kwesinye isikhathi donsa, futhi kungasebenza kahle kakhulu uma, ngokwesibonelo, omunye wenu ejwayele ukukhululeka futhi omunye ahleleke ngokwengeziwe. Noma omunye wenu enamawala ngaphezulu kanti omunye ehlela ngokucophelela.
Uma nigcwalisana, umehluko phakathi kwenu ungaba namandla.
Kodwa kwesinye isikhathi ukwehluka kobuntu kungasho ukuthi ngeke nje nivumelane nganoma yini noma nizwane ngezikhathi ezithile. Kungasho ukuthi ubheka impilo ngombono ohluke ngokuphelele, futhi ulwela ukuqonda izimo zengqondo noma izindlela zakho zomlingani wakho ezintweni.
Kancane kancane, lokhu kuqhekeka kungaphenduka imigodi, futhi ekugcineni ubuhlobo buvele buhlukane.
2. Unezinhloso ezahlukene zempilo.
Mhlawumbe ubuntu bakho bufana, kepha okufunayo empilweni kusehluke kakhulu.
Izinhloso zakho zempilo, noma okubaluleke kakhulu kuwe, yizinto odinga ukuthi nizenze ngokufana nophathina wakho uma nobabili nizohlala ndawonye isikhathi eside.
Isibonelo, mhlawumbe bafuna ukuhamba, noma ukuchitha isikhathi eside behlala phesheya, futhi okubaluleke kakhulu kuwe ukusondela emndenini wakho.
Mhlawumbe bagxile ekuzuzeni imali, kanti wena ubona nje imali njengendlela yokufeza okuthile, hhayi inhloso.
Kungenzeka ufuna ukushada, kanti abakwenzi . Mhlawumbe bafuna izingane, kanti wena awufuni.
Uma unemizwa enamandla ngalokho okufunayo empilweni futhi umlingani wakho engabelani ngakho, lokho kungasho ukuphela kobudlelwano bakho.
Yingakho kubaluleke kakhulu ukuthi ucacelwe ngezinto eziza kuqala futhi uxoxe ngalezi zinto kusenesikhathi, ngakho-ke akukho zimanga ezimbi ezingezansi.
Uma uthola ukuthi nobabili ninemigomo ehlukile yempilo, kufanele nicabangisise ukuthi ngabe zinjalo yini amadili amadili kwakho.
Ungangeni ebudlelwaneni bebhange ngeqiniso lokuthi uzokwazi ukushintsha umqondo wabo ngokuthile uma wazi ukuthi awuzimisele ukushintsha okwakho.
3. Unezimiso ezihlukile.
Lokhu kuvamise ukuba yinto abantu abayibona lapho beqala ukwazi umuntu omusha, kepha kwesinye isikhathi kungakumangaza lapho usuzinikele ebudlelwaneni.
Lokhu akuyona inkinga njalo kuwo wonke umuntu, kepha kungadala ukwahlukana okujulile.
Isibonelo, uma unezinkolelo ezehlukene, eziqinile zezepolitiki, ungathola izikhathi zokhetho noma izimo zezombangazwe eziphikisanayo zibe nzima kakhulu ukuzithwala, njengoba ungeke nje usonge ikhanda lakho emibonweni yabo.
Futhi uma omunye wenu enezinkolelo eziqinile kakhulu zezenkolo noma zokuziphatha, nobabili ningaba nobunzima bokuzwana.
ihembe lika-austin 3 16
Izinkinga zingavela futhi uma uqala ukucabanga ngokuba nezingane bese ubona ukuthi awukwazi ukuvumelana ngezisekelo zendlela yokuzikhulisa.
Izimiso zomuntu kwesinye isikhathi zingashintsha ngokuyisisekelo ngokuhamba kweminyaka noma ngaphezulu, nokushayisana okungaba yimbangela yokuthi ubudlelwane buhluleke.
4. Anithembani.
Kwesinye isikhathi, lokhu kungaba ngumphumela wento eyenzeke esikhathini esedlule ukwenza kube nzima ukuthi omunye wenu athembe.
Kepha imvamisa, ubudlelwano buphela ngoba umlingani oyedwa wephula isibopho sokwethembana, futhi noma ngabe bazama kangakanani, abashadikazi abakwazi ukuphilisa leso sibopho.
Ezimweni eziningi, ukungathembeki ocansini kulimaza noma kuqede ukwethembana phakathi kwabantu ababili. Kepha kunezinye izinto eziningi ezingadla ukholo lwakho kumlingani wakho.
Mhlawumbe usuthole ukuthi bakhulume amanga ngawe mayelana nesikhathi sabo esedlule, noma bakushiya ngemuva, noma bakugcinele imininingwane ebalulekile yezezimali kuwe ... noma ngabe ngenxa yecala noma ngenxa yokwesaba.
Uma ukhethe ukwakha impilo yakho nothile, unelungelo lokwazi ngezinto ezithile, futhi ukuthola ukuthi bezikugcine ebumnyameni kungasho ukuthi ukuthola kungenzeki ukubeka ukholo lwakho kuzo futhi. Ikakhulukazi lapho babeka ikusasa lakho noma ukuphepha kwakho engcupheni.
Imibhangqwana eminingi iyakwazi ukusebenza ukungathembeki okwedlule noma ukukhaphela futhi yakhe kabusha ukwethembana, kepha akulula ukwenza. Futhi ukuntuleka kokwethembana kuyisizathu esikhulu sokuthi kungani ubudlelwano buhluleka.
5. Anithandani.
Njengoba iminyaka idlula, uthando luyashintsha futhi luguquke.
Uthando olunomdlandla owuzwayo lapho uqala ukuhlangana nomuntu lungaqala ukuphela, kepha kufanele lubuyiselwe uthando olujulile nothando oluqinile lomuntu okhethe ukuchitha impilo yakho naye.
joe rogan nakho audio kuphela
Kepha kwesinye isikhathi, uthando lungaphela ngokuphelele. Kungahle kube khona okudala ukuthi nibukane ngokuhlukile, noma ungahle uthandane ngaphandle kwesizathu esithile.
Uma uthando seluphelile ngokuzithandela, kungaba nzima ukwamukela ukuthi ubudlelwano sebuqhubekile, kepha akekho umuntu okufanele aphile ngaphandle kothando ezimpilweni zakhe.
6. Oyedwa noma nobabili niyesaba.
Isikhathi eside, ubudlelwano obunzima bungaba yizinto ezisabisayo. Kungaba ukwesaba ukuzibophezela okuza phakathi kwenu, kepha imvamisa ukwesaba ukulimala.
Ukuba sebudlelwaneni, ngemuva kwakho konke, kuyinto enkulu. Ubeka ithemba lakho ngokuphelele komunye umuntu futhi umvumela ukuba adilize zonke izindonga ozakhe ngokucophelela.
Ukuthandana nothile kuyingozi. Ngoba kungenzeka noma yini.
Bangakushiya, noma kukhona okungenzeka kubo. Ngeke sazi ukuthi yini elindile ekhoneni, futhi amathuba yilokho uthando luzosizwisa ubuhlungu kanye nokusilethela injabulo.
Akufanele siphile izimpilo zethu ngokwesaba esihlalweni somshayeli, kepha uma ubudlelwane bufinyelela esiphethweni, kungenxa yokuthi oyedwa noma bobabili abalingani abakwazanga ukunqoba ukwesaba kwabo.
7. Omunye wenu nobabili ubhekene nobunzima.
Kwesinye isikhathi, noma ngabe bathandana kangakanani abantu, izinto zingenzeka empilweni ezingena phakathi kwabo.
Uma oyedwa noma bobabili bedlula enkingeni engokomzwelo, yomuntu siqu, yobungcweti, noma yezezimali, ubunzima ebudlelwaneni kwesinye isikhathi bungaba bukhulu kakhulu.
Ngakho-ke, khumbula ukuthi akuyona inkinga eyisisekelo ngaso sonke isikhathi nobudlelwano uqobo obungadala ukuthi buphele.
Singabantu kuphela, futhi kwesinye isikhathi, uthando esiluzwa ngomunye umuntu alukwazi ukusinda esimweni esibuhlungu.
8. Ukhula ngokuhlukana.
Njengabantu, sonke sisesimweni sokuguquguquka njalo. Sithanda ukucabanga ngathi njengezinto ezingaguquki, kodwa sihlala sishintsha, sikhula, futhi sithuthuka njengoba iminyaka ihamba.
Sakhiwe ngokuhlangenwe nakho esinakho nabantu esihlangana nabo. Futhi lokho kungaba yinkohliso uma kukhulunywa ngobudlelwano.
Umuntu onguye manje kungenzeka angafani kangako nomuntu owawunguye lapho wahlangana nomlingani wakho, futhi kungenzeka ukuthi badlule ekuguqulweni okwedlulele ngokulinganayo.
Lokho akuyona inkinga ngaso sonke isikhathi. Ningakhula futhi niphumelele ndawonye, nisekelane futhi nifunde okuthile okusha ngomunye umuntu nsuku zonke.
Kepha ungahle uhlukane, wakhe izintshisekelo ezahlukahlukene, imigomo, okubalulekile, izinhloso…
Akunandaba ukuthi naniphelele kangakanani lapho nihlangana, asikho isiqinisekiso sokuthi nizohlala ninjalo kuze kube phakade.
9. Omunye noma nobabili ninamathemba angenakwenzeka ngamanye.
Kunezinto ezithile esingazilindela ngokufanele kozakwethu - ukwethembeka, ukwethembeka, inhlonipho… ngisho nezinto ezincane ezifana nokusazisa ukuthi bazofika nini sekwedlule isikhathi ekhaya.
Kepha kukhona izinto eziningi okungenangqondo ukulindela kumlingani wethu.
Lapho ulindele ukuthi okuthile kwenziwe ngendlela yakho nangendlela yakho kuphela, wehlele ekulawuleni ukuziphatha.
Akekho noyedwa umuntu ozokwazi ukuphila ngokuvumelana nezindinganiso zakho noma enze izinto ngendlela othanda ukuba zenziwe ngayo njalo. Futhi lokho kuzoholela ekudumazekeni kwakho.
Ngaphezu kwalokho, umlingani wakho kungenzeka azizwe ekucasukela ngoba kubonakala sengathi ufuna ukubashintsha babe yilo mbono ongafinyeleleki wokupheleliswa.
Ekugcineni, ukudumazeka kwakho nentukuthelo yabo kuzoqhuma, futhi konke okuzosala kuyindawo eshunqayo lapho ubudlelwano babukade bukhona.
10. Omunye wenu unobugovu.
Ubudlelwano obunempilo budlelwano - mhlawumbe abulingani ngokuphelele sonke isikhathi, kodwa busondele kakhulu.
Kepha uma wena noma umlingani wakho nenza ngobugovu, kuzobeka ubunzima obungenakugwemeka ebudlelwaneni.
yinsimbi indoda ibuya
Ubugovu bungaba umlingani oyedwa ongadonsi isisindo sakhe maqondana nezibopho ezisebenzayo zokuqhuba ikhaya nempilo.
Kungakhombisa ngokungakaze kwenzeke ukubeka izidingo zomunye umuntu kuqala, noma ngabe bengaphansi kwengcindezi nengcindezi kwezinye izingxenye zempilo yabo
Kungaba ngisho nokwenqaba ukuyekethisa ekukhetheni okwenziwa ngokuhlanganyela futhi uphikelele ekutholeni okuthandwa nguwe.
Ngokuziphatha kwabo, umuntu ozicabangela yena ukhombisa umlingani wakhe ukuthi balibeka phansi kangakanani inani labo, futhi lokhu kungakhipha umgoqo obulalayo phakathi kwakho.
11.Anihloniphani.
Inhlonipho yinto esiyikhombisayo cishe kukho konke esikwenzayo. Kodwa kwesinye isikhathi akuyona inhlonipho esiyikhombisayo, kodwa inhlonipho. Futhi lapho inhlonipho ingekho, ubudlelwano abunampilo.
Manje, eminye imibhangqwana ingakwazi ukuhlala ndawonye ngisho noma omunye noma bobabili abalingani bengamhloniphi omunye (futhi kukhombisa lokhu), kepha lobo budlelwano abuzoba obuthokozisayo.
Kungenzeka kakhulu ukuthi umuntu ozizwa engahlonishwa uzofuna ukuphuma ebudlelwaneni uma engaboni ngcono esimweni ngemuva kokukhuluma ngakho konke.
Ukuntuleka kwenhlonipho kunobuthi futhi kungangena kalula emanzini ahlukumezayo uma ukungaziphathi kahle kuvunyelwe ukuqhubeka kungaphikiswa.
12. Anikwazi ukuxhumana ngempumelelo nomunye.
Ukuxhumana okuhle kusekela ubudlelwano obunempilo. Zihambisana. Awukwazi ngempela ukuba nobudlelwano obunempilo ngaphandle kwekhono elifanele lokuxhumana nomunye.
Kungani? Ngoba njengoba useduze njengoba ungacabanga ukuthi ukhona, umbhangqwana wakhiwe ngabantu ababili abahlukene abangakwazi ukufunda izingqondo zomunye nomunye noma bezwe ukuthi bazizwa kanjani.
Amagama angumsele phansi lapho imicabango nemizwa yethu ihambela kumlingani wethu. Futhi lapho singakwazi ukuxhumana ngempumelelo, asikwazi ukuveza esikufunayo nezidingo zethu.
Ukungakhulumisani kahle noma ukungabikho kokuxhumana kuholela ekungaqondani, imizwa elimele, futhi ekugcineni kungqubuzana.
Lapho izindlela zokuxhumana ziphela ngokuphelele, ubudlelwano abunakuphila isikhathi eside. Oyedwa noma bobabili abalingani bazosheshe badonse ipulagi.
13. Niyasolana ngakho konke.
Uma kwenzeka okuthile obekungafanele kwenzeke, noma uma kwenzeka ngokwehlukile kunendlela obungathanda ngayo, ngabe iphutha likabani?
Uma impendulo yakho yalowo mbuzo ihlale iyiphutha lomlingani wakho, kukhona ukuqhekeka okukhulu ezisekelweni zobudlelwano bakho.
Nini ophathina basolana ngakho konke , kuholela entukuthelweni, ekukhungathekeni, entukuthelweni, nakwezinye izinhliziyo eziningi.
Le mizwa iqeda konke okuhle okungahle kube khona ebudlelwaneni kuze kungabikho lutho olusele futhi ubudlelwano buyehluleka.
Ngeke nje ube nobudlelwano obunempilo nobusebenzayo lapho ngamunye wenu umunwe wakhe wecala ulungiswe ngokuqinile ebhekise kumlingani wakhe. Nobabili kudingeka nithathe umthwalo wezenzo zenu kanye nokuphendula kwenu ngokwengqondo ezenzweni zomunye.
kukhombisa ukuthi akakuthandi
14. Omunye wenu ubambe igqubu.
Kuzoba nezikhathi ebudlelwaneni bonke lapho umuntu oyedwa ecasula omunye. Lokhu kungenzeka njalo, noma kaningi, kepha kuzokwenzeka.
Intethelelo iyithuluzi elibaluleke kangaka ekugcineni ubuhlobo. Uma ungeke uxolelane ngalezo zikhathi lapho umngcele weqiwe futhi kubangelwa ubuhlungu, ungalindela kanjani ukuba nithandane, nihloniphane, futhi nethembane?
Ngoba, uyabona, igqubu linobuthi ebudlelwaneni. Kungaba ubuthi obuthatha kancane, kepha ekugcineni kubangela ukuthi kufe konke okuhle ngobudlelwano.
Futhi lapho lokho kwenzeka, ubudlelwano buzophela.
Khumbula: ubudlelwano kungenzeka behlulekile, kepha wena awukaphumeleli.
Njengomphakathi, sithambekele ekubhekeni kunoma yibuphi ubuhlobo obugcina njengokwehluleka. Ngenkathi, eqinisweni, obunye ubudlelwano nje bungahloselwe ukuhlala ingunaphakade.
Abantu bangangena ezimpilweni zethu isikhathi esifushane futhi basinike uthando nenjabulo, kuze kufike isikhathi sokuqhubeka.
Into ebalulekile okufanele uyikhumbule ukuthi ubudlelwano obuhlulekile akusho ukuthi wehlulekile. Kunoma iyiphi indlela.
Iqiniso lokuthi awukwazanga ukugcina ubudlelwane buqhubeka lapho bekungeyona into elungele nina nobabili alukhombisi njengomuntu, noma ukubaluleka kwakho.
Kunothando olukhulu kakhulu oluphambi kwakho kunalokho ongakucabanga. Linda nje ubone.
Ucabanga ngokuqeda ubuhlobo bakho noma usuvele uhlukana? Xoxa ku-inthanethi kuchwepheshe wezobudlelwano ovela ku-Relationship Hero ongakusiza ukuthola izinto. Kalula.
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