Ingabe u-chameleon wezenhlalo?
Angiqiniseki?
Ake sibheke ezinye zezici zalolu hlobo lobuntu bese sithola - kuneziningi zazo (thina!) Kunokuba ungacabanga.
Isici esiyinhloko senkonjane yezenhlalo, njengontanga yabo eshintsha imibala ngokushintshashintsha kombala, yikhono lokuhlangana ngaphandle komthungo kunoma iyiphi indawo yokuxhumana nomphakathi.
Bangaba impilo nomphefumulo weqembu noma bathule futhi kugodliwe banaka kakhulu izinkomba zomphakathi futhi bazolingisa indlela yokuziphatha kwabanye.
Lokhu kuguquguquka kwezenhlalo kaningi kuyikhono eliwusizo kakhulu, nezimpande zalo ezingokwengqondo esidingweni sethu somuntu sokuzizwa sifakiwe emphakathini.
Lokho kusho, kukhona labo abazibekela ngenhloso eqondile yokuzibumba nokuzakha kabusha njengoba isimo esithile sisho.
Bangakwazi ukujikijela ngaphandle kokuzibandakanya kalula baye ekucabangeni ngokuthula, njengoba isimo sifuna njalo.
Ukuzivumelanisa nezimo okunjalo kubenza babe nekhono ekuqambeni amanga, kodwa futhi bangamakhosi ezimpaphe ezithobekile lapho izimo zomphakathi zingahambi kahle.
Laba yibo 'opharetha' beqiniso esivame ukubabona, mhlawumbe ngokubabaza, kepha mhlawumbe nangokudelela okuncane.
Okuthokozisayo ukuthi, uma sithinteka kulolu hlobo lokushintshwa kobunjwa bomuntu, kungokwemvelo futhi akukho lutho kangako ukuthi kaningi asazi nokuthi siyakwenza.
Futhi, ngokuhle noma ngokugula, kukhona okungaphezu kokuncane kwalolu hlobo lokuziphatha kuningi labantu.
Kukangaki ukhuluma nomuntu onamagama agqamile futhi ungahlosile uzithola ulingisa i-twang yabo ehlukile?
Noma mhlawumbe uzibambe ngokungazi ukopisha ulimi lomzimba lomuntu okhuluma naye?
Yini i-Psychology?
Ekugcineni, kwehla isayikholoji kanye nomqondo owodwa ngemuva kokuthambekela kwethu kwemvelo kokulingisa ukuziphatha kwabanye abantu ukuthi kungabakhuthaza ukuthi bazizwe kahle ngathi.
Futhi iningi lethu thina bantu lithanda ukuthandwa, akunjalo?
TO kwembula ukutadisha kwengqondo zimisele ukuhlola ukuthi ingabe abantu balingisa ngokuzenzakalela abanye, ngisho nabantu abangakaze bababone ngaphambili.
Izifundo ezingama-78 zixoxe 'nomuntu ongaphakathi' - umuntu angamazi - obenconyelwe ukumamatheka, ukuthinta ubuso babo, nokunyakazisa izinyawo zabo ngesikhathi sokuhlangana.
ungazixolela kanjani ngento embi
Imiphumela ikhombise ukuthi iningi lezifundo ngokungazi lilingise ukunyakazisa unyawo nokuthinta ubuso.
Umbuzo wesibili isifundo esihlose ukuwuphendula ukuthi ukulingisa kukhuphule ukuthanda yini.
Kulokhu kuvivinya, izihloko zixoxe ngezithombe ezingahleliwe nabangaphakathi.
Abanye bangaphakathi babetshelwe ukuthi balingise ulimi lomzimba lolu daba, kanti abanye babetshelwe ukuthi bangakwenzi.
Lapho bebuzwa ngemuva kwalokho ukuthi bazizwa kanjani ngokusebenzisana, izihloko ezathola ukulingiswa zikulinganise njengokujabulisayo kunalabo abangazange bakwenze.
Unemiphumela engqondweni, ingabe sonke singazuza ngokwandisa ukulingisa kwethu?
Ngabe sonke kufanele sibe ngokufana nonwabu ekuziphatheni kwethu?
Kungenzeka yini lokhu kube yinto ezoba ukhiye wempumelelo emsebenzini noma empilweni yethu yezothando?
Ngokudabukisayo akunjalo.
Kungani?
Ngoba ingxenye esemqoka yomphumela wonwabu ukuthi asiqapheli ukuthi siyakwenza.
Noma imuphi umzamo wokukopisha ulimi lomzimba wabanye cishe ngeke ube nomphumela esiwuhlosile.
Ungayibona Kanjani Inhloni Yomphakathi
Njengoba uDkt Mark Snyder, isazi sokusebenza kwengqondo eNyuvesi yaseMinnesota, sikubeka kanjalo, unwabu lomphakathi luzama “ukuba umuntu ofanele endaweni efanele nangesikhathi esifanele.”
Zincane futhi i-intuitively evumelekile ngendlela abanye abaphendula ngayo kubo futhi baguqule njalo ukuziphatha kwabo lapho bezwa ukuthi abadali umbono ofanele.
UDkt Snyder uqhubeka ngokucaphuna imbongi yaseBrithani uW. U-Auden, othembeke ngokwanele ukuthi avume ukuthi iqiniso lomuntu wakhe 'belihluke kakhulu emfanekisweni engizama ukuwakha ezingqondweni zabanye ukuze bangithande.'
Ngokusho kukaDkt Snyder , onogwaja bezenhlalo - ‘abaziqaphelayo’ njengoba ebabiza - bavamise ukwenza lokhu:
- bhekisisa ukunakekelwa kwezenhlalo, uhlolisise abanye ngokulangazelela ukwazi ukuthi yini okulindeleke kubo ngaphambi kokuphendula.
- zama ukuba njengoba abanye belindele ukuthi babe yibo, ukuze uzwane futhi uthandwe. Isibonelo, bazama ukwenza abantu abangabathandi bacabange ukuthi banobungane nabo.
- basebenzise amakhono abo kwezenhlalo ukubumba ukubukeka kwabo njengoba izimo ezingafani zifuna, ukuze, njengoba abanye bekubeka, 'Ngabantu abahlukile ngiziphatha njengomuntu ohluke kakhulu.'
Ungahle uthande (i-athikili iyaqhubeka ngezansi):
- Izimpawu ze-4 Uziqambela Amanga Kuwe (+ Izindlela Ezi-6 Zokukuyeka)
- Izinto Eziyi-11 Kuphela Abantu Abaqotho Abaqonda Ngokuphila
- Kungani Ubuqotho Bubaluleke Kangaka Ekuphileni
- 'Kungani Abantu Bengangithandi?' - 9 Izizathu Abantu Abafuni Ukuba Umngane Wakho
- Izimpawu Ezi-7 Zabangane Bamanga: Ungayibona Kanjani I-Mile Off
- Ngabe uMachiavellian Usikala Kanjani Ku-1-100?
kathathu h vs randy orton
Ungawethemba Umgogodla Womphakathi?
Sekukonke, lezi zimfanelo zingabonakala njengezinhle kakhulu futhi ziwusizo, ikakhulukazi kuzindawo zokuhweba.
Kepha ucwaningo lukhombisa ukuthi umuntu onekhono lokuzibumba abe ngumuntu ohlukile angakhokha inani ebudlelwaneni bakhe obuseduze.
Yize bengaphumelela kakhulu ekwenzeni ukubonakala okuhle ekuxhumaneni nomphakathi nabantu abangabazi noma ezimweni zebhizinisi, bathambekele ekulweni nobungani nezothando.
Ubudlelwano obunjalo obusondele ekuthembekeni futhi kuyaqondakala ukuthi kunzima ukwethemba umuntu onobuntu obuketshezi futhi obungalindelekile.
Gcina umcabango, noma kunjalo, ngabantu abangaguquguquki ngakolunye uhlangothi, abangakwazi ukulungisa ukuziphatha kwabo ukuze bavumelane nabanye, baneqoqo lezinkinga ezahlukahlukene.
Ukuqina kwabo kanye ukungabi naluzwela kungababiza kakhulu ngokwezenhlalo.
Ngokujabulisayo, iningi lethu lihlala endaweni ethile phakathi kwalezi zigxobo ezibhekene.
Ucwaningo lukaDkt Snyder luveze ukuthi cishe abantu abangama-40% bathambekele ekuguquleni indlela abaziphatha ngayo ukuze ivumelane nezimo ezahlukahlukene - indlela ye-chameleon.
Ama-60% asele awalawulwa kancane yile nkanuko yokuzijabulisa ngazo zonke izindlela.
Uthi abantu abaningi basebenza ebangeni eliphakathi nendawo, behluka isitayela sabo ngokuya ngezimo ezahlukahlukene zenhlalo noma zomsebenzi.
Ukuphikisana Akuhehi
Ungahle ucabange ukuthi unwabu lwenhlalo luyoba namandla okuqhubana nanoma ngubani, ne-fluid yakhe… kepha uzobe unephutha uma kukhulunywa ngokuphikisana kwabo kwe-polar.
UWilliam Ickes, isazi sokusebenza kwengqondo eNyuvesi yaseTexas, wahlola abantu abavela emaphethelweni ahlukile esikalini, ukuhlola ukuhambisana kwabo bobabili.
Isifundo sakhe uveze ukuthi abantu ababili ngasohlangothini olulodwa lwe-spectrum - ephezulu noma ephansi - babezwana kahle, kuyilapho ngababili abahlanganisiwe bengatholi ndawo abavumelana ngayo.
UDkt Icke uchaze:
‘Abasezingeni eliphansi bafana noJohn Wayne, i-taciturn eyiyo futhi iyafana nje noma ngabe bakuphi. Ukuphakama kufana noWoody Allen's Zelig, ngokuzama ukuzama ukulingana nanoma ngubani abakanye naye. Kepha abaphansi abaniki amaphuzu aphezulu ngokwanele ukwazi ukuthi kufanele bazame kanjani ukuba khona. ”
UChameleon ‘Wobungcweti’
Kuyathakazelisa ukuthi abantu abaningi bavame ukufana nonwabu endaweni yokusebenza, lapho bejwayelene kakhulu nesidingo sokugcizelela esifiso sabo sempumelelo.
Abantu abafanayo, nokho, bahlala beqiniso ngokwengeziwe kubo lapho besekhaya, lapho singekho isidingo sokuba zonke izinto kubo bonke abantu ngaso sonke isikhathi.
Futhi, ngenkathi sisendabeni yomsebenzi, akumangazi ukuthi imisebenzi ethile iheha abantu abangokwemvelo abakwazi ukulungisa isimo sabo ukuze bavumelane nanoma yisiphi isimo ababhekene naso.
Okusobala kakhulu, kuyasebenza, kepha onjiniyela bezenhlalo nabo bahamba phambili kwezombusazwe, emibuthanweni yezingxoxo, nakuwo wonke umsebenzi ohlobene nokuthengisa.
Futhi benza ukuqhekeza abameli bezokushushisa ngezizathu ezisobala. Ezindimeni ezinjengalezi, unwabu lungasebenza ezingeni eliphezulu kakhulu.
Akukhona Konke Okubi
Masingabi nombono omubi kakhulu mayelana nonembeza bezenhlalo, ngoba amandla okuzwelana, ukuzibeka ezicathulweni zomunye umuntu, iyikhwalithi yabantu edingekayo futhi encomekayo.
Umhlaba ubuyoba yindawo empofu ngaphandle kwawo.
Kulapho kuthathwa ngokweqile lapho lokhu kuziphatha kuholela ku ukonakala kokwethembana futhi kuthinta ubudlelwano.
Iningi lethu, ngemuva kwakho konke, likhetha ukuhlangana nabantu abathembeke kubo ngokwabo futhi ozibophezele ekushintsheni isimo somphakathi akunjalo.
Njengezinto eziningi, kumayelana nezinga futhi ngokusobala kukhona labo abasemaphethelweni ahlukene we-spectrum yokuziphatha, kusukela kubasebenza kakhulu ekugcineni kuya kokuphikisana kwabo kwe-polar abangakwazi ukuzivumelanisa nhlobo.
Lokho kushiya iningi lethu liphakathi, liguqule indlela esiziphatha ngayo ngokuqonda njengoba kudingeka ukuze bushelelezi ekuxhumaneni kwethu nabangane, umndeni, kanye nabantu esisebenza nabo.
Singaba njengonwabu uma isimo sidinga, kepha ngasikhathi sinye sihlale sineqiniso kithina.
