Uma ulwela ukuvula abantu, ungakhathazeki - awuwedwa!
Ukuvuleka nokwethembeka kungabonakala cishe kungenzeki kwesinye isikhathi, futhi lelo zinga lokuba sengozini kungenzeka lingazizwa liyindlela ongayikhetha manje.
Ungakuthola kunzima ukwazi abantu noma ukugwema ukuxhumana nabantu ngokuphelele ngoba awunaso isiqiniseko sokuthi ungahlangana kanjani futhi uxhumane nothile.
Sinezeluleko ezisebenzayo zokuthi ungavula kanjani ngaphezulu uma ufuna ukuqala ukwehlisa unogada wakho.
1. Khetha umuntu ofanele.
Esinye sezizathu esenza iningi lethu libe nenkinga yokuvulela umuntu othile yingoba sike salimala esikhathini esedlule.
Kungenzeka ukuthi sayitshela imfihlo umuntu osikhaphele, noma savuma imizwa kothile owabe esesilahla.
Noma ngabe yikuphi okuhlangenwe nakho kwakho kwangaphambilini, kubalulekile ukuvulela umuntu ofanele lesi sikhathi.
Thola umuntu omthandayo futhi omethembayo futhi uzikhulule ngaleyo ndlela.
Qiniseka ukuthi wabelana ngokufanele - ngenkathi umngane wakho omkhulu angafuna ukuzwa ngezinkinga zakho zobudlelwano, ubaba wakho kungenzeka angakwenzi.
2. Yinikeze ukuhlolwa.
Awudingi ukuvuma imicabango yakho ejulile, emnyama kakhulu kumuntu ongamazi, kodwa ungazikhulula.
Thululela okuthile okuncane nokungabalulekile kumuntu omethembayo. Qiniseka ukuthi akuyona into yomuntu siqu noma eluhlaza - ufuna ukuzijwayeza nje ukwabelana ngemfihlo nothile noma ukukhuluma ngemizwa yakho.
Kufanele uqale ngemininingwane emincane futhi wakhe kusuka lapho isikhathi ngasinye lapho uvulela othile.
Abanye abantu bagijimela futhi bafihle imfihlo yabo enkulu komunye umuntu, kuphela ukuzizwa bekhathazekile ngokuthi lowo muntu angatshela abanye lokho okushilo noma akuphoxe ngokukusebenzisa ngokumelene nawe.
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Esikhundleni sokwenza lokhu, qala kancane futhi ngeke uzizwe sengathi kukhona okulahlekelayo.
Lapho wabelana ngokwengeziwe ngezinto ezincane, uzoqala ukuzizwa usondele kubantu futhi uyobavumela bangene kakhudlwana.
3. Thola esivumelana ngakho.
Uma ungaqiniseki ukuthi ungamvulela kanjani othile, qala ngokuthola okuthile enivumelana ngakho.
Le yindlela enhle yokuqala ubungani, noma ubudlelwano, futhi izonisiza nobabili nizizwe nikhululekile ngomunye nomunye.
Nizoba sezingeni elifanayo nomunye futhi nizoqala ukuzizwa nithakazelisayo futhi nizethemba ngokwengeziwe njengoba nazana.
Ukukhuluma ngezinto nobabili enizikhathalelayo kuzokusiza ukujwayela ukukhuluma ngawe, futhi uzobe usendleleni yokuba uvuleke ngokwengeziwe ngokomzwelo.
4. Benze bavule kuqala.
Uma uzama ukulinganisa i-vibe futhi wakhe ukwethembana okuthile, babuze mayelana nabo kuqala.
Lapho ukhathazekile ngokuvula, ungacabanga ukuthi wonke umuntu wabelana ngokwesaba okufanayo.
Kepha abantu abaningi abanankinga ngokuvula, ngakho-ke ungababuza ngentokozo okuthile okuqondene nawe, wazi ukuthi mhlawumbe bazophendula.
Ukwabelana nabo ngemicabango nemizwa yabo kuzokusiza ukuthi wakhe ubudlelwano bokuthembana, futhi kukwenze uzizwe ukhululeke ngokwengeziwe ukuvula kubo nabo.
5. Khuluma ngothando.
Ukukhuluma ngezinto onentshisekelo yoqobo kuzo kwenza umehluko omkhulu ekutheni uzimisele kangakanani ukuvula.
Awudingi ukuqala ngokwabelana ngokuhlukumezeka kwakho kobuntwana ukuze wakhe ukuxhumana ngokomzwelo nothile. Esikhundleni salokho, khuluma ngokukhululekile ngokuthi uyithanda kangakanani i-yoga, noma ibhola, ngokwesibonelo.
Uthando lwakho luzofika futhi abantu bazobandakanyeka kulokho kangangokuthi ngeke uze ukhumbule nokuthi kungani wethuke kangaka ukuqala ukukhuluma kwasekuqaleni!
6. Yiba yiqiniso.
Awudingi ukwaba yonke imininingwane emincane yemicabango noma imizwa yakho ukuze ube yiqiniso, udinga nje ukwethembeka futhi ungaqambi amanga.
Ngokuhlala uthembekile kuwena, uzokhombisa uhlangothi lwangempela lobuntu bakho kothile. Lokhu kuzobasiza bazizwe bexhumeke kakhulu nawe (bazokwazi ukuthi ukhuluma iqiniso nini futhi bazokufudumala).
Kusho nokuthi akudingeki ukhathazeke ngokuhambisana nanoma yimaphi amanga owakhulume esikhathini esedlule.
Abanye abantu bayethuka lapho bekhuluma ngabo, bese benza izinto zizwakale zithakazelisa ngokwengeziwe, noma ukufihla izinto ezithile abazizwayo.
Kungaba nzima-ke ukukhumbula ukuthi iyiphi inguqulo yendaba oyitshele ubani, futhi uzibeka engcupheni yokuqhamuka ungathembekile ngengozi.
Esikhundleni salokho, namathela eqinisweni futhi ube nguwe - bazofuna ukwazi owangempela. Uma kungenjalo, abasifanele isikhathi sakho noma kunjalo.
7. Kubhale phansi kuqala.
Ukwenza i-journalling kuqala kungakusiza ukuthi ucubungule ukuthi uzizwa kanjani nokuthi ufuna ukuthini.
Kungakusiza ukuba ube nekhono ngokwengeziwe ekuchazeni kwakho futhi uthole izindlela ezinhle kakhulu zokuchaza izinto.
Kungakusiza nokuthi unqobe noma yikuphi ukuphoxeka onakho mayelana nodaba, njengoba uzobe ujwayele 'ukukhuluma' ngalo ngesikhathi usisho ngokuzwakalayo.
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8. Jwayela ukuba sengozini.
Uma ulwa ngempela nomqondo wokuba namahloni noma amahloni noma ukuba neqiniso ngokugcwele nothile, kungenzeka kungenxa yokwesaba ukuba sengozini.
Awufuni ukuphatheka kabi, awufuni ukukhashelwa, futhi awufuni ukwaliwa.
Lokhu kungakuvimba ekuvuleni futhi ungakugwema ukwenza ukuxhumana kwangempela.
Zama ukwenza ezinye izinto ukuze uphume endaweni yakho yokunethezeka, njengokuthatha isigaba somdanso esisesidlangalaleni, noma ngabe ucabanga ukuthi uzokuzonda, noma uziphoqele ukuxoxa nomuntu ongamazi, noma ngabe uzizwa unamahloni.
Ulwazi lokuthi unqobe ukwesaba kwakho kuzokusiza uzizwe uzethemba ngokwengeziwe futhi uthanda ukuthi ungabhekana nanoma yini - kufaka phakathi ukuvula ngawe.
9. Vula umzimba.
Singakujwayela ukugwema ukuba sengozini kangangokuthi nathi siqale ukuzincipha ngokomzimba.
Ulimi lomzimba wakho lungashintsha phakathi nengxoxo eshubile, noma ungahle uzivale ngokuzivikela ngokoqobo ngokomzimba nangengalo noma ukuzibamba phambi kwakho, ngokwesibonelo.
Uma uqaphele ukuthi ujwayele ukusebenzisa ukukhuluma komzimba wakho ukukhulumela wena kulolu hlobo lwesimo, kufanele wenze ushintsho lapha.
Kuzwakala kuwubuwula futhi sengathi ngeke kwenze mehluko omkhulu, kepha kwesinye isikhathi kudingeka sishintshe ngaphandle ukuze sishintshe ngaphakathi.
Vula umzimba wakho ngaphezulu, uncross izingalo zakho bese ukhomba izinyawo zakho kunoma ngubani okhuluma naye.
Lezi zinguquko ezincane, ezicashile zizokwenza kubo uzizwe uvulekile ngokwengeziwe njengoba bezobona ukuthi usebenzisana kakhulu nabo - lapho bevula kakhulu, maningi amathuba okuthi nawe uzolandela.
10. Ukuqiniswa okuhle.
Kungazwakala kungasile, kepha kubalulekile ukugubha ukunqoba okuncane! Ngokuzikhumbuza ukuthi ufike kude kangakanani isikhathi ngasinye lapho uthatha igxathu eliya phambili, uzoqala ukuzethemba kakhulu kuwe nakumakhono akho.
Zithengele okuncane njengokuklomelisa, noma ubhale ukuthi uzizwa kanjani ukuze ube nesikhumbuzo esiqhubekayo sokuthi ingakanani inqubekela phambili osuyenzile.
Uma unabangani abambalwa abaqondayo abaziyo ukuthi kunzima kangakanani kuwe ukuvula, ungaba impumelelo yakho nabo futhi.
11. Qhubeka.
Enye yezindlela ezinhle kakhulu zokwenza noma yini umkhuba onempilo ukukwenza njalo.
Ngokudabukisayo, ukufunda ukuvula akuyona into yesikhathi esisodwa, yokulungisa ngokushesha. Qhubeka nayo, qhubeka wabelane ngemicabango nemizwa yakho, futhi uqhubeke ulungisa indlela yakho njengoba uqhubekela phambili.
Uzoqhubeka nokuthola ukukhululeka ngokwabelana nabanye abantu, futhi, uma ukwenza ngokwengeziwe, kuzoba lula kuwe.
Uzofika esigabeni lapho ungadingi ukuzikhuza ngokwengqondo noma uhlele kusengaphambili - kuzomane kuzenzekele kuwe futhi ngeke uze ucabange ngakho ngemuva kwalokho.
12. Thola inkinga.
Uma usenzima ngempela futhi ubulokhu uzibeka lapho ngangokunokwenzeka, ungahle udinge ukubhekana nenkinga eyisisekelo.
Kungaba khona 'ukuvinjelwa' okungokomzwelo okukuvimbela ekuhlanganyeleni ngokugcwele nothile, njengokuhlukumezeka ebuntwaneni noma ukwaliwa okukhulu kwezothando.
Ungakuchithi lokhu okuhlangenwe nakho ngoba kungaba nomthelela omkhulu endleleni esiziphatha ngayo, noma ngabe sekudlule iminyaka.
Uma uzivumele waba sengozini ngaphambili futhi wenqatshwa, noma ubukade unobungane obunobuthi futhi obungenampilo kanye nobudlelwano, ungahle udinge usizo lochwepheshe ukuze udlule kulezi zinkinga.
Kulungile ukuvuma ukuthi ungathanda usizo oluthile futhi kuyisibonakaliso sokuvuthwa nokukhula ukuze ufune ukwesekwa ngaphandle kwakho.
Awunaso isiqiniseko sokuthi uvulela kanjani abantu, noma udinga isandla sokubamba njengoba uzama? Xoxa ku-inthanethi kuchwepheshe wezobudlelwano ovela ku-Relationship Hero ongakusiza ukuthola izinto. Kalula.
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