Yini oyifunayo kozakwethu?
Mude, umnyama, futhi muhle?
Mhlawumbe - kepha kuthiwani nge- kwangempela izici zobudlelwano? Uyazi, izinto ezidlula ukuheha ngokomzimba kanye 'nokuhleka okuhle, ukuthanda izinja, kuyakujabulela ukupheka'?
Ake singene emgudwini wobudlelwano futhi sihlole izinto okufanele ngabe uzibheke ngempela izingcezu ezenza ubudlelwano obuhle bube bukhulu, futhi ezikusizayo ekwakheni ukuxhumana okuhlala njalo nabantu obathandayo.
1. Ukugcina izinga lokuzimela.
Ukuzimela kuyinto ebaluleke kangako yokuba ebudlelwaneni obunempilo, obusebenzayo.
Kubaluleke kakhulu kunoma yibuphi ubuhlobo - usadinga impilo yakho, uhlelo lwakho lokusekela, imicabango nemizwa yakho.
Abaningi bethu bazizwa bexhumeke kakhulu kothile (ikakhulukazi uma sisesigabeni sokuqala 'se-honeymoon') ukuthi sicishe sikhohlwe ukuthi singobani ngempela.
Hlala uzimele futhi ubudlelwano bakho buzosizakala kakhulu ngabo.
Lokho kusho ukuhamba uyokwenza into yakho, ukujabulela isikhathi sodwa, ukuchitha isikhathi nabangane abangeyona ingxenye yeqembu lakho lobungane bobabili, futhi ungesabi ukuba nesikhathi kude nomlingani wakho.
Lokhu kuzoholela endleleni enempilo ebudlelwaneni futhi kukusize ugweme noma yikuphi ukuthembela okunobuthi - esizochaza ngakho manje…
2. Kwakha okunamathiselwe okulinganiselayo nemingcele.
Lapho siqala ukubona umuntu, izinto zingashesha kakhulu ngokushesha okukhulu.
Kuyafaneleka ukuthatha isinyathelo emuva ukubheka ukuthi lokhu kusho ukuthini.
Ngabe nobabili nakha kanjani okunamathiselwe komunye nomunye? Ngabe izizwa incike kokunye noma izizwa ilinganisiwe futhi ikhululekile kunoma iluphi uhlobo lwengcindezi?
Lapho ucabangela okufanele ukubheke ebudlelwaneni, kufanele ubheke ukuthi ukuhlobana phakathi kwakho nobabili kunempilo kangakanani.
ukutshela kanjani umuntu wesifazane ukuthi uyakuthanda
Ingabe uzizwa ukhathazekile uma bengaphenduli umbhalo ngokushesha?
Ngabe bayakucindezela ukuthi uzibophezele ngemuva kwezinsuku ezimbalwa nje?
Kuyafaneleka ukunaka lolu hlobo lwento lapho uqala ukubona umuntu, njengoba kuvame ukukhombisa ukuthi ubudlelwano buzoqhubeka kanjani njengoba uqhubekela phambili.
Amandla wokwakha nokunakekela uphilile imingcele nakho kuyisihluthulelo, futhi kufanele uzizwe ukhululekile ukwenqaba izinto, futhi kufanele bazizwe bekhululekile ukukuthola lokho - futhi okuphambene nalokho.
Ezinye zezikhathi ezihamba phambili ebudlelwaneni benu kuzoba izikhathi enizichitha nihlukene, njengasemuva njengoba zingase zizwakale njengamanje.
Ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, uzobona ukuthi kubaluleke kangakanani ukuchitha isikhathi wedwa, ukuba nemingcele enempilo endaweni, nokuzizwa ukhululekile ngokwanele komunye nomunye ukwakha okunamathiselwe okulinganiselayo, okunempilo.
Ngaso sonke isikhathi khumbulani ukuthi niyizifantu ezimbili ezihlangana ndawonye ngobunye - aniphelelisani.
3. Ukuhlala uthembekile kuwe.
Sonke besikhona - uhlangana nomuntu omangazayo futhi ngaphambi kokuthi wazi, impilo yakho isiphenduke konke ngaye.
Awukaze uye ekilasini lakho le-yoga lamasonto onke, ubheyili kubangani ukuze uchithe isikhathi esithe xaxa nomlingani wakho, futhi kungenzeka ukuthi uphambene neminye yemigomo yakho noma izinqumo ozikhethayo ukuze ulingane kangcono nazo.
Lokhu kujwayelekile ngandlela thile kodwa akunampilo kakhulu, futhi kungaholela ngokushesha ebudlelwaneni obushubile kakhulu - kanye nentukuthelo ethile.
Ungase ucabange ukuthi uyathanda ukuthi impilo yakho ixhumene kakhulu neyabo, kepha, ngesikhathi esithile, uzoqala ukucasukela iqiniso lokuthi unabo kanye nabangane babo endaweni yokucima ukoma esikhundleni sabangane bakho abasekilasini lakho lokudansa.
Uma ufuna okuthile okunenjongo ebudlelwaneni, funa amandla okuhlala uthembekile kuwe.
Thola umuntu okhululekile ukuhlala naye, futhi hhayi ukuba no. Kufanele uzizwe ukwazi ukuba nempilo ngaphandle kobuhlobo bakho - njengoba kufanele nomlingani wakho.
4. Ukwabelana ngomthwalo ongokomzwelo.
Isigaba 'se-honeymoon' nomlingani omusha siyamangalisa - kepha kwenzekani lapho impilo yangempela ishaya?
Kuhle ukuba nomuntu ohlekisayo futhi othokozisayo, kodwa kubalulekile ukuthi ubheke umuntu ongakusekela futhi abe khona kuwe.
Nizoba nesimo sezulu esiningi njengabantu abashadile, futhi udinga ukuba nomuntu ongabelana ngalowo mthwalo ongokomzwelo futhi abe eceleni kwakho.
Kungenzeka ukuthi wawukade unabalingani ngaphambi kokukuvumela ukuthi uthwale imithwalo noma izingcindezi empilweni yakho ngaphandle kokukusiza noma ukukuxhasa. Le ifomu le- ukunganakwa ngokomzwelo .
Kepha kufanele umuntu ongakwazi ukuma nawe, akubambe ngesandla, futhi anqobe izinto nawe - njengezithandani.
Noma yiziphi izinselelo obhekana nazo njengabantu abashadile kufanele zibhekane nobabili - hhayi wena wedwa.
Sivame ukuthatha okungaphezu kwamandla ethu ngoba sikhathazeka ukuthi umlingani wethu angahle angazami ukusiza. Esikhundleni sokubanika ithuba lokusidumaza, senza konke ngokuzilungisa izinto ngokwethu.
Ubudlelwano bakho kufanele bube mayelana nokunikela nokuthatha, kanye nokuthi kube mayelana ukuyekethisa nokusebenzisana.
Ungakuthatha ngokwemigomo yokubhekana nezinto ezithile ezisindayo kubambiswano lwakho, okuyinto enhle, inqobo nje uma nobabili nisidonsa ngokulinganayo isisindo sakho.
Ungahle ubhekane nezinto ngqo njengombhangqwana futhi nihlangane ngempela ukubhekana nobunzima nezikhathi ezinzima.
Kunoma ikuphi, lokhu kudinga ukuba kube yinto ongayenza nge umlingani wakho, hhayi ngoba umlingani wakho!
ngiyalawula ebudlelwaneni
5. Ukushiya indawo yokukhula.
Lapho sichitha isikhathi esiningi nomuntu esimthandayo, singaqala ukuzibona njengenhlangano.
Lokhu kujwayelekile, futhi kuyathandeka, kepha udinga ukukhumbula ukuthi usengazikhulisa.
Akuyona yonke into oyihlelayo edinga ukuba yicebo lenu njengabashadikazi - kungaba wuhlelo lwakho njengomuntu ngamunye.
Ukuba nomlingani okukhuthaza ukuthi ukhule kuyamangalisa. Kusho ukuthi bayemukela ukuthi ungubani, nokuthi ufuna ukuba ngubani, futhi bakhombisa ukuthi bayayisekela intuthuko yakho yangasese.
Kukhombisa nokuthi abanamona noma abazethembi ebudlelwaneni bakho, nokuthi banokholo olwanele kuwe lokuthi bangakhula ngaphandle kokubadlula.
Abanye ophathina bathola indawo futhi bakhathazeke ngokuthi inqubekela phambili yabalingani babo izobasusa kude - lokhu akunjalo ngempela!
Khumbula ukuthi ikhono, nokuzibophezela, ekuzenzeni ngcono kuheha kakhulu kumlingani. Ngubani ongatholi isifiso sokuzijabulisa, akunjalo?
Ukukhula nokuthuthuka akufanele kube okwesabisayo noma okukhathazayo - akusho ukuthi uyahlukana phakathi, kusho ukuthi uthatha isibopho sokuziphendulela nokuziphendulela futhi ufuna ukuqhubeka nokuzisebenzela.
Kukhombisa ukuthi unezindinganiso eziphakeme, okufanele zinikeze umlingani wakho umfutho! Uma umlingani wakho ejabule ngokudla ukudla okuvela kudoti, ubungakhathazeka ngokuthi abasoze bakwazisa ngempela ukudla okumnandi okwe-7 endaweni yokudlela enezinkanyezi ezinhlanu.
Ngokulinganayo, uma bejabule ukuhlala 'kulungile nje' kwezinye izici zempilo yakho, uzosala uzibuza ukuthi bayoze babone yini ukuthi umangalisa kangakanani.
Uma uzibuza ukuthi yini okufanele uyibheke ebuhlotsheni, funa umaqondana osekela ukukhula kwakho komuntu siqu futhi ongakwesabi.
6. Ukwamukela (nokugubha!) Umehluko wakho.
Abaningi bethu, lapho bebuzwa, bangasho ukuthi singathanda umuntu ojabulela izinto ezifana nezethu. Lokho kwenza umqondo omkhulu, ikakhulukazi uma silandela othile ozohlanganyela nathi kumijikelezo yethu yangeSonto noma ngoLwesihlanu lwethu lwasendle siphume.
Kodwa-ke, into enhle ongayibheka ebudlelwaneni yikhono lokwamukela umehluko womunye nomunye.
Mhlawumbe bachitha izimpelasonto zabo benza okuhlukile futhi bangakwethula kokuzilibazisa okusha. Mhlawumbe bangavula ingqondo yakho emibonweni emisha noma emibonweni ephikisayo owawungakaze uyicabangele ngaphambili.
ukulahlekelwa yinkondlo yelungu lomndeni
Lokhu kungamandla ayisihluthulelo ebudlelwaneni, futhi akufanele wamukele kuphela umehluko wakho, kodwa uwugubhe!
Ukungezwani kwenu yikho okuzonisiza nisondelane nakakhulu, futhi kuyisici esibalulekile kini nobabili bokugcina ubuntu benu yize nihlanganise izimpilo zenu ndawonye.
7. Ukuhlala uvulekile.
Ukuvuleleka emibonweni nasezinkolelweni ezintsha kubalulekile kunoma yibuphi ubuhlobo, futhi kufanele kube yinto ehamba ngazo zombili izindlela.
Njengoba sishilo ngenhla, kubalulekile ukubungaza umehluko phakathi kwakho nomlingani wakho, kepha lokhu kudlulela ngale kwalokho.
Akukhona nje ngokujabulela ukuba nezintshisekelo ezahlukahlukene, kepha kokubili ukuvuleleka nokuzivumelanisa nezimo - ngokwengxenye emibonweni yomunye nomunye, kodwa futhi nasezinseleleni eningahlangabezana nazo ndawonye njengezithandani.
Ungahle udinge ukuba nomqondo ovulekile mayelana nomlingani wakho okhetha ukuyofunda phesheya izinyanga ze-6, noma ungahle ufune ukuthi bavuleleke emcabangweni wokuthi uqale ibhizinisi lakho noma uyeke umsebenzi wakho ukuze uzimele.
Izinto zizokwenzeka ngenkathi nindawonye okungekho noyedwa kini owayengazihlelela, noma ngabe wayezozihlelela. Ukuvuleleka kulezi zinto nokuzimisela ukusebenzisa isikhathi nomzamo ekuzivumelaniseni nazo kubalulekile.
8. Ukuthembana nokuhloniphana.
Kukhona okulindelwe okuthile abantu abanakho ebudlelwaneni babo okungenangqondo.
Kodwa-ke, kufanele ubheke ukuthembela ebudlelwaneni - futhi lokho kufanele kube ubuncane obungenalutho!
Baningi bethu abafuna ukuzijabulisa njalo kumlingani ohlekisayo osenza sihleke ngaso sonke isikhathi, nokuthi ngubani esinothando olukhulu naye.
Ngezinye izikhathi siyakhohlwa ukuthi kubaluleke kangakanani ukuzizwa siphephile futhi sithathwa njengabantu abahlonishwayo nabathandwayo.
Lezi yizinto okufanele uzibheke ebudlelwaneni obunempilo futhi yizo ezizokwenza ukuthi okuthile kusuke ekuzijabuliseni okujabulisayo kuye ebudlelwaneni besikhathi eside, obunakekelayo.
Funa umuntu okulalelayo futhi akwenze uzizwe uzwakala - futhi ukulungele ukukunikeza okufanayo.
Ufanelwe ukuba nomuntu okuthembayo futhi akunikeze inkululeko yokuphila impilo yakho ngaphandle kokuphonswa imibuzo noma ukusolwa - futhi udinga ukwengeza ukwethemba nokuhlonipha okufanayo kumlingani wakho.
Ngakho-ke, uma ubuzibuza ukuthi yini okufanele uyibheke ebuhlotsheni, kufanele ube nemibono emihle manje!
Ngaphandle kokuheha ngokomzimba nokunambitheka okufanayo emculweni, udinga ukubheka izici zobudlelwano obufunayo - hhayi umuntu omfunayo kuphela.
Khumbula ukubaluleka kwakho futhi ugcine izindinganiso zakho ziphakeme. Akukho lutho kulolu hlu olungajwayelekile noma olufuna ngenkani ukuthi kumane kuyizici zangempela zobudlelwano ezicwaninga ngamaqiniso okuba nothile, hhayi nje umbono wothando lomlingani wakho wamaphupho.
Hlala ubheka, hlala unethemba, futhi unganaki okungaphansi kokufanele ...
Ngabe awunaso isiqiniseko sokuthi ubheke ini ebudlelwaneni? Xoxa ku-inthanethi kuchwepheshe wezobudlelwano ovela ku-Relationship Hero ongakusiza ukuthola izinto. Kalula.
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- Kubaluleke Kangakanani Ukuheha Ngokwenyama Ebudlelwaneni? Izinto Ezi-7 Okufanele Uzicabangele.
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