Anginakungabaza ukuthi wonke umuntu ophilayo unesifiso sokuthola injongo ezimpilweni zakhe, kodwa ngabe bona - NAWE - basesha endaweni engafanele ngokuphelele? Futhi impendulo isibhekile ebusweni?
Njengoba labo kini abaye bafunda indaba yami yokuzisiza bazokwazi, ngingumlandeli omkhulu wemisebenzi yesazi sezifo zengqondo uViktor Frankl nokugxila kwakhe ekutholeni injongo njengendlela yokubhekana nezikhathi zokuphila nezimbi. Impela, angikwazi ukuzibamba ngibona incazelo, noma ukuntuleka kwayo, ezinkolelweni nasezenzweni zabantu, empilweni yami nasemhlabeni obanzi.
ungithumelela imiyalezo nsuku zonke kepha akafoni
Kepha ukufunwa kwencazelo imvamisa abantu abalwa nakho ngoba akubonakali ngokushesha lapho umuntu kufanele abheke khona ukukuthola. Abanye abantu babheka ingcebo, abanye emandleni, abanye ekuphishekeleni injabulo nganoma iyiphi imali, kanti abanye bavele bayiyeke ngokuphelele.
Ngabe kukhona lokhu kuzwakala kujwayelekile?
Ukuba ngumuntu njalo kukhomba, futhi kuqondiswe, entweni ethile noma kothile, ngaphandle kwakho - kungaba incazelo yokugcwalisa noma omunye umuntu ohlangana naye.
UFrankl, owasinda emakamu okuhlushwa ahlukahlukene amaNazi, wasikisela ukuthi incazelo ivela emithonjeni emibili eyinhloko:
- Uthando nomunye.
- Isizathu esikhulu kunawe.
Ngizophikisana lapha ukuthi okwesibili kwalokhu kumane nje kuyisandiso sokuqala nokuthi, noma kunjalo uthola injongo empilweni yakho , kuyohlala kubuya othandweni oluphakathi kwakho neminye imimoya.
Yini Isizathu Esikhulu Kunakho?
Lapho uFrankl ekhuluma ngesizathu lapho ungathola khona incazelo, ngikholwa ukuthi ubhekise entshisekelweni noma emandleni ofuna ngawo shintsha umhlaba ube ngcono . Uphethe ngokuthi imbangela enjalo kufanele ibe ngeyangaphandle empilweni yakho ngamanye amazwi, awukwazi ukwenza impumelelo yakho noma injabulo yakho kube umgomo wezenzo zakho.
Impumelelo, njengenjabulo, ayinakulandelwa kumele yenzeke.
Ubize lokhu kuzidlula okusho ukuthi ngaphesheya komuntu uqobo. Le mbono iqhamuka ngokuphikisana nezinkolelo zabanye ongqondongqondo abaningi - njengoFreud noNietzsche - abaphakamisa ukuthi indlela esemqoka eya enjabulweni nasencondweni yomuntu kungokulandela izinto zangaphakathi ezifana nenjabulo namandla.
Izibonelo kungaba yilezo zimbangela zendabuko ezinjengokusiza ukuqeda ubuphofu, ukuphilisa abagulayo, ukuvimbela izifo, noma ukufundisa abasha. Noma kungaba yizinto ezinjengokuvimbela ukonakaliswa kwemvelo, ukugqanyiswa kwenkohlakalo yezepolitiki, noma ukuvuswa kwabantu emphakathini nokwakhiwa komphakathi weqiniso.
Noma ngabe yikuphi, inhloso yokugcina yokubandakanyeka komuntu kuleso sizathu akumele kube yincazelo yabo.
Bamba, ngakho-ke usho ukuthi ngingathola incazelo ngokuzinikela enkambisweni ethile, kodwa ukuthi angikwazi ukuzinikela kunhloso ngesisekelo sokuthi izongilethela incazelo?
Yebo, yilokho kanye mina noFrankl esikushoyo. Ngeke umane uthole imbangela, udle kuwo futhi ulindele ukuthi impilo yakho igcwale injabulo nenjongo. Kufanele uzimisele ukuzidela ngenxa yalokhu, kufanele ubambe uthando lwangempela ngakho, futhi bekungafanele ulindele ukubuyiselwa okuthile.
kungani engithumelela umyalezo kuphela
Kungaleso sikhathi kuphela lapho incazelo ingathola khona indlela eya kuwe.
Ungahle uthande (i-athikili iyaqhubeka ngezansi):
- Izinhlobo Ezi-4 Zabantu Abaningi Kakhulu Ukuhlushwa Inkinga Ekhona
- Ukudangala Okukhona: Ungayinqoba Kanjani Imizwa Yakho Yokungabi Nanjongo
- Izindlela Ezi-9 Zomphakathi Wanamuhla Zibangela Umshini Okhona
- Ungayigwema Kanjani Inkathazo Ekhona Yesikhathi Senkinga Ngezikhathi Zokukhula Komuntu
Ukuzinikezela Esenzweni Kunguthando Olufihlayo Nje
Impikiswano yami-ke yile, ukuthi noma yisiphi isizathu sokuzinikela kwakho, isizathu sokwenza njalo sihlala sibuyela othandweni onalo ngomunye. Kepha, njengoba bengizama ukucacisa ngokugcizelela kwami okungenhla, lolu thando luphakathi kwakho neminye imimoya, hhayi phakathi kwakho nabanye abantu.
Yebo, izimbangela eziningi zibhekiswe enhlalakahleni yabanye abantu, kepha kuneziningi, uma zingaphezulu kwalokho, ezigxila kwezinye izinhlobo zokuphila. Uthando umuntu angalukhombisa umhlaba wemvelo obanzi aludluli kunalolo esikwaziyo ukulukhombisana.
(Ngifuna futhi ukuveza ukuthi izimbangela zezenkolo noma ezinye izinto ngaphandle kokubhekana nezindawo ezingaphandle kwaleli zwe nazo ziyizindawo ezivumelekile zencazelo uma zisekelwe othandweni.)
Ngakho-ke, noma ngabe usebenzela ukwakha izikole zezingane ezihlwempu ezweni elisathuthuka noma ulwela ukuvikela imvelo ebalulekile yasolwandle olwandle lwethu, ukhombisa uthando lwemimoya edlula eyakho.
Uthando wumgomo ophakeme kakhulu umuntu angawufisa.
UViktor Frankl wayekholelwa ukuthi amandla othando okuletha injongo ezimpilweni zethu ayemakhulu ngokungachazeki futhi ngivumelana naye ngenhliziyo yonke. Ukuthola lowo moya onganikeza uthando lwakho ngokugcwele kuyisihluthulelo sokuphila impilo egculisayo.
Ngakho-ke lokhu kuncenga umbuzo:
Ngabe kufanele ngabe sibuza ukuthi “ngubani” hhayi ukuthi “yini” injongo yokuphila?
