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Ingabe unenkinga yokuxhumana kwamehlo?
Akuwena wedwa.
Idlala indima ebalulekile ekuhlalisaneni nabantu okunempilo, kepha abantu abaningi bakuthola kungakhululekile neze.
Abantu bavame ukubheka labo ababheka futhi bagcine ukubonana emehlweni ezingxoxweni njengobungane, ukwamukela, ukuvuleka, nokwethenjwa.
Futhi, ngeshwa, lezo ezingabukwa ngokungabaza, njengezingathembekile, noma ezivaliwe.
Bese kuba nenkolelo evamile yokuthi ukwenqaba noma ukuthintana iso ngokushesha kungachazwa njengophawu lokungathembeki nokuqamba amanga.
Eqinisweni, abaqambimanga abahle kungenzeka bangaphonsi noma yiziphi izimpawu zomzimba eziveza ukungathembeki. Bayazi ukuthi abanye bayazibheka lezi zimpawu. Esikhundleni salokho, bangahle babheke umuntu ngqo emehlweni lapho beqamba amanga kubo, bazi ukuthi lowo muntu kungenzeka akholwe.
Leyo yinkinga yabantu abangathandi ngokweqiniso ukwenza nokuxhumana ngamehlo ezingxoxweni.
Ukuntuleka kokuxhumana kwamehlo ngokuvamile akuhlangene ngalutho nomlingiswa. Kuhlobene kakhulu namahloni, ukukhathazeka, izifo zengqondo, noma izifo zengqondo ezenza leso sici senhlalo kube nzima. Ukukhathazeka kokuxhumana kwamehlo nakho kungahlotshaniswa ne-neuroticism, psychopathy, PTSD, kanye ne-autism.
Kungani abanye abantu bekuthola kunzima kakhulu ukubheka iso futhi yini ongayenza ukuze kube lula?
Kuyini ukukhathazeka ngokuxhumana kwamehlo?
Ukukhathazeka ngokuxhumana kwamehlo kubhekisa ekungaphatheni kahle umuntu akuzwayo lapho ebheka iso noma eqhubeka nokubuka emehlweni kothile.
Uhlobo lokungakhululeki umuntu abhekana nalo luzothonywa ukuthi kungani ezizwa ngendlela azizwa ngayo. Wonke umuntu unamazinga ahlukahlukene okududuza uma kukhulunywa ngokuxhumana kwamehlo.
Abanye bangathola ukungakhululeki okuncane. Abanye bangazizwa bephendula kabuhlungu ngokomzwelo okubabangela ukucindezeleka okukhulu - njengomuntu one-autism ohlangabezana nokugcwala ngokweqile nokuncibilika noma umuntu onenkinga abhekene ukuhlaselwa ukukhathazeka .
Ukukhathazeka kokuxhumana kwamehlo nakho kungabangelwa amahloni noma ukungazethembi kubantu ngaphandle kwezinkinga zempilo yengqondo.
Ukuxhumana ngamehlo nomunye umuntu kubangela izimpendulo ezithile ebuchosheni, ezinye zazo ezingavinjelwa noma zibe nenkinga kuya ngobuntu bomuntu .
Lokho kuchazwa kolwazi kungaphazanyiswa okunye ngenxa ye- ubufakazi okuphakamisa ukuthi ukutolika ngomlomo nakho kuhlanganiswe ezingxenyeni ezifanayo zengqondo ezilawula ukuthintana kwamehlo.
Ukuxhumana Kwamehlo Ne-Autism
Ubunzima ngokuxhumana kwamehlo kuyimfanelo ejwayelekile ehambisana ne-autism.
Labo abane-autism banayo umsebenzi omkhulu ezindaweni zobuchopho obhekene nokutolika isimo sobuso . Bayakugwema ukuthintana kwamehlo ngoba kungadala ukulayishwa ngokweqile, ukungakhululeki ngokweqile, ngisho nobuhlungu.
Umuntu we-autistic angabhekana nokungakhululeki ngoba ukuxhumana kwamehlo kuyinto esondelene nabantu abaningi.
Kungashukumisa imizwa eminingi okunzima ukuthi umuntu we-autistic ayizwe futhi ayicubungule ngenxa yezinkinga zokuphazamiseka.
Ukuxhumana Kwamehlo Nokukhathazeka Komphakathi
Umuntu onenkinga yezenhlalo angazizwa engakhululekile neze futhi esaba ngokusobala ngokubheka iso kwabanye.
Lesi senzo sibangela i-amygdala - ingxenye yobuchopho obhekene nezimpendulo zokwesaba - ukuxwayisa umuntu ngengozi lapho kungekho songo sangempela.
Umuntu onenkinga yezenhlalo angahle enze konke okusemandleni akhe ukugwema ukuthintana kwamehlo nokuzihlanganisa nabantu ukuze angazizwa engakhululekile, okungalungile, noma ukuhlaselwa ukukhathazeka.
Kungamangaza ukuthi abantu abahlukahlukene abanenkathazo yezenhlalo bangaba kanjani. Abahlale bethule, abantu abangenele abagwema iso lomphakathi ngazo zonke izindlela.
Kunabaculi abaningi, osomahlaya, nabaculi abanokukhathazeka kwezenhlalo abenza phambi kwezixuku kodwa babe nesikhathi esinzima ekuhlanganyeleni komuntu ngamunye.
Yini inani elifanele lokuxhumana ngamehlo?
Indawo emnandi yokuxhumana kwamehlo incike ekuhlelweni komphakathi.
Ebudlelwaneni bomuntu siqu, izikhathi ezinde zokubheka iso zamukelekile ngoba kukhona ukusondelana okwabiwe phakathi kwabantu.
Lobobude bunganweba ngokuya ngokuthi basondele kangakanani labo bantu. Ubungani obujwayelekile kufanele buhambe bube lula ekubhekaneni kwamehlo, ngenkathi ubudlelwano obujulile nobusondelene kakhulu bungabelana ngokubuka okude.
Emhlabeni wobungcweti, kungcono ukuthi uhlose ubude besikhathi obulinganiselwe noma ubhekane nezikhawu ezinengqondo uma udinga isikhashana ukuze uphinde uzithole noma uzisethe kabusha.
Okufanelekile, uzofuna ukunaka i-cadence, ukugeleza, nesisindo esingokomzwelo sesimo.
Isibonelo, kuvame ukuba ngcono ukubonana emehlweni ukuze ungathumeli inkomba engeyona eyomlomo ukuthi isikhundla sakho sithambile noma sibuthakathaka engxoxweni engathi sína, empikiswaneni, noma ekusebenzelaneni ngebhizinisi.
Engxoxweni evamile, ungaphula uphinde uvuselele ukuthintana kwamehlo yonke imisho embalwa futhi akekho noyedwa ongacabanga kabili ngakho.
izimpawu zokuxineka ngokocansi emsebenzini
Futhi abantu ngokuvamile kabanaki kakhulu uma unganikeli isikhathi esiningi kusipika lapho usesimweni seqembu.
Kuthatha isikhathi futhi uzijwayeze, kepha ngemuva kwesikhashana ungathatha futhi uzwe ukugeleza kwezingxoxo ukuthola izindawo ezifanele zokuqeda ukuxhumana kwamehlo.
Ukubheka isikhathi eside kungcono kunokugqolozela kanzima. Umthetho omuhle ojwayelekile wesithupha ungamasekhondi angu-5-10 ngokubuka okude.
Ungahle uthande (i-athikili iyaqhubeka ngezansi):
- Ama-Hacks Wokuzithemba Komuntu Ongaqondakali Komphakathi
- Umhlahlandlela Womuntu Ongathandeki Komphakathi Wokuphola
- Izindlela Ezi-7 Zokukhombisa Ngokuphepha Ukuba Sengozini Kwezemizwa Ebudlelwaneni
- Yisho Lezi Ziqinisekiso Eziyi-6 Zosuku Nosuku Ukwakha Ukuzethemba Nokuzethemba
Ngabe ukubheka kuphi ukugcina ukubheka iso?
Inkulumo ethi 'ukuthintana kwamehlo' ingahle ibonakale iyinto eqondile, kepha akunjalo.
Ukuthintana kwamehlo akusho ukuthi uhlala njalo ubheke njalo emehlweni omunye umuntu.
Eqinisweni, ungathola izinzuzo ezifanayo zenhlalo nezingasho lutho ngokubheka indawo ejwayelekile yamehlo noma ezinye izingxenye zobuso bomuntu.
Kungaba nzima ukuthi umuntu abheke ngqo emehlweni omunye umuntu, kepha angathola ukungakhululeki okuncane uma kunalokho abheka ibhuloho lekhala noma ngaphezulu kwamehlo abo.
Uma usebenza ukwakha ukunethezeka okwengeziwe kokuxhumana kwamehlo, ungashintsha futhi kancane kuyo yonke ingxoxo.
Bheka emehlweni omuntu isikhathi esifushane, phula amehlo akho, bese ubheka ibhuloho lamakhala abo esikhundleni salokho. Abantu ngokuvamile ngeke bawubone umehluko.
Isixwayiso esisodwa esincane: uzofuna ukugwema ukusuka kusuka emehlweni abo uye ebhulohweni lamakhala abo ngaphandle kokwephula amehlo akho, ngoba lokho kuzobenza bazibuze ukuthi ubukeleni ngempela.
Ukubunciphisa kanjani ukungakhululeki kokukhathazeka kokuxhumana kwamehlo?
Ikhono lomuntu lokunciphisa ukungakhululeki abakutholayo ekukhathazekeni kokuxhumana kwamehlo kuzoya ngokuthi kungani bekuthola kwasekuqaleni.
Izingqinamba ezinzima kakhulu njengokuphazamiseka kokukhathazeka komphakathi, i-PTSD, kanye ne-autism kuzodinga ukubhekelwa emnyombweni wazo ngaphambi kokushintshwa kwezingqinamba. Lokho kungadinga usizo lochwepheshe oqinisekisiwe noma umuthi ofanele.
Noma kunjalo, kunezinye izindlela umuntu angazama ngazo ukusebenza ekukhathazekeni kwamehlo abo.
Ekuzameni ukulungisa izindaba ezinjengalezi, kuvame ukuzuzisa ukuzicwilisa kancane kulokho okwenza ungakhululeki.
Kungaba lula ukuzijwayeza umuntu omethembayo noma othandekayo uma unenkinga nabantu ongabazi noma abantu abanegunya.
Ingxoxo yevidiyo futhi ingaba inketho enhle yokuzijwayeza ukuthintana kwamehlo nokuzwela ukuhamba kwengxoxo. Leyo ngqimba yezobuchwepheshe eyengeziwe phakathi kwabantu inganikeza indawo ethambile yokuzijwayeza kuyo.
Uma usunethezeke ngalolo hlobo lokuxhumana ngamehlo, ungaqhubeka nokuzijwayeza izingxoxo nabantu osebenza nabo nabantu ongabazi.
Yakha iso lokuhlangana nabanye abantu ngaphambi kokuba uqale ukukhuluma nabo. Ngokwenza njalo, ungakha umkhuba oba inkumbulo yemisipha kanye nemvelo kunokudinga ukucabanga ukuthi uzoxhumana kanjani.
Ngemuva kokuthi isibopho sokuqala sisunguliwe, ungabheka ngokukhululeka ngaphezulu noma uphawule ukubuka kwakho ngomzimba ngesikhathi esifanele.
Ngokuvamile kubaluleke kakhulu ukugcina ukuthintana kwamehlo ngenkathi ulalele kunokukhuluma. Abantu kungenzeka bangazizwa njengawe ukulalela ngenkuthalo uma ukunaka kwakho kucacile kwenye indawo ngenkathi bekhuluma.
wwe inkosi yendandatho yabakaki
Umthetho omuhle wesithupha usemigqeni yokugcina iso libalelwa ku-70% wesikhathi ngenkathi ulalele, u-50% ngenkathi ukhuluma.
Ukuzithuthukisa akuyona into eyenzeka ngokuphazima kweso. Kudinga umzamo ophikelelayo, ongaguquguquki wokusebenza kulolo hlobo lokukhathazeka.
Ukuthuthuka ngokujwayelekile kuzokhula kancane kancane esikhathini eside - futhi lokho kulungile! Kulungile ngoba lolu hlobo lokuzithuthukisa kungenzeka lube nawe impilo yakho yonke.
Ukuqhekeza Ukuxhumana Kwamehlo
Kunezindlela ezilungile nezingalungile zokwephula ukuxhumana kwamehlo. Akukaze kube umqondo omuhle ukubheka phansi futhi ubheke kude ngoba lokhu kungahunyushwa njengokuxhumana ukwethuka noma ukungathembeki.
Akukaze kube umqondo omuhle ukusebenzisa ifoni yakho njengesiphazamiso, uyinaka kakhulu kunozakwethu wengxoxo.
Uma unqamula ukuthintana kwamehlo, kulungile ukubheka eceleni noma phezulu nasekude.
Ungasebenzisa futhi ukukhuluma komzimba njengendlela yokwephula ukuthintana kwamehlo, njengokunikeza ukuvuma okugcizelelayo kwephuzu lomunye umuntu.
Noma uma umuntu omusha ejoyina ingxoxo, leso futhi yisikhathi esihle sokudlulisa ukunaka komuntu.
Ukuthuthukisa Nokuhlonipha Amakhono Akho Komphakathi
Ukubaluleka kokuxhumana kwamehlo okunempilo akukwazi ukunganakwa. Abantu abaningi ngokwazi nangokungenangqondo basekela ukutolika kwabo kwabanye abantu ezintweni ezingasho lutho, ukuxhumana kwamehlo kungenye yezinto ezibaluleke kakhulu.
Kungahle kungabi yiqiniso ngokweqiniso, kepha yindlela abantu abavame ukutolikelana ngayo. Ukuthintana kwamehlo okuseqophelweni eliphezulu kungadlulisa ukwethembeka nobuqotho ngendlela amagama angenakukwazi ngayo.
Cabanga ukubonisana nodokotela wezempilo yengqondo uma uzizwa ukhathazekile ngokuxhumana kwamehlo nabanye abantu. Kungabangelwa inkinga edinga usizo olwenzelwe wena uqobo, ukunqoba.
Ngabe lokhu ukuzindla okuqondisiwe kungakusiza shaya ukwesaba kwakho ukubuka iso ? Sicabanga kanjalo.
