Ngabe uzizwa ubhajwe ebudlelwaneni bakho noma emshadweni wakho?
Lesi yisimo esivamile abantu abaningi okuzodingeka babhekane naso ngesikhathi esithile…
… Kepha izindaba ezinhle ukuthi kunezixazululo zayo yonke inkinga.
Ake sibheke lezo ezi-5 ezivame kakhulu, nokuthi ungazilungisa kanjani.
1. Nisathandana, Kodwa Hhayi “Ngaleyondlela”
Konke okuhlangenwe nakho esinakho kusishintsha ngandlela thile.
Lokhu kusho ukuthi sonke sikhula futhi sishintsha ukuqondisa njalo.
Ngenxa yalokho, sihluke kakhulu namuhla kunalokho esasiyikho eminyakeni embalwa eyedlule.
Njengoba ungacabanga, lokhu kunemiphumela uma kukhulunywa ngobudlelwano bethu nabantu.
Kungenzeka ukuthi nobabili niye nazwana ngokumangalisayo ekuqaleni, kodwa nobabili seniguquke kaningana kusukela lapho… futhi hhayi ngendlela efanayo.
Izintshisekelo zakho, ukuthambekela kwezepolitiki, kanye nemizimba yakho kungenzeka kushintshe kakhulu.
Impela, nobabili ningathandana kakhulu, kodwa ngokuyisisekelo nihlala ndawonye endlini njengamanje.
Ngenye indlela, bangahle bakuthande ngothando, kepha wena awunantshisekelo kubo ngendlela efanayo.
Lokho kuphatheka kabi kakhulu futhi kungenza umuzwa 'obanjiwe' ube mubi kakhulu.
Izinto ziba nzima kakhulu lapho futhi uma uzizwa unecala noma unesibopho lapho ucabanga ukubashiya.
kusayina ukuthi ufuna ukulala nawe kuphela
Ungahle ucindezeleke lapho ucabanga ngokusondelana nabo ngokocansi, kodwa uzizwe sengathi uyabashiya uma uhamba, ikakhulukazi uma benezinkinga zempilo yengqondo noma yomzimba ezilimaza ukuzethemba kwabo.
Izimo ezinjengalezi azizixazululi…
Ngeke uvuke ngolunye lwalezinsuku ubuyelane nomlingani wakho ngomlingo, futhi ukuhlala kulesi simo kuzokwenza izinto zibe zimbi kakhulu.
Intukuthelo , ukudangala, nokukhathazeka ngezinye zezinkinga ezimbalwa ezingezinhle ezizovela uma ungathathi isinyathelo sokulungisa isimo.
Thembeka kumlingani wakho mayelana nokuthi uzizwa kanjani. Izoncela, futhi kuzoba kubi, kepha futhi kuzoba nokuxazululwa.
Ungasaba ngempela ukulimaza lo muntu ngoba umkhathalela kakhulu ... kodwa uma ubakhathalele ngempela, uzofuna bajabule ngangokunokwenzeka.
Futhi lokho ngeke kwenzeke ngokuthi ubacasukele.
Thembeka, xoxani ngezinto, futhi nisebenzele izinyathelo ezilandelayo ndawonye, njengabangane abamangalisayo eningabo.
2. Uzwa Ukuthi Udinga Ukuhlala Ndawonye Ebantwaneni
Ukuzizwa ubhajwe ebudlelwaneni kunzima ngokwanele, kepha kuba nzima kakhulu lapho kunezingane ezihilelekile.
Wena nozakwenu nisebenza ngokubambisana ukunakekela izingane zakho, ngemithwalo yemfanelo esukela ekuphakeleni, ekushintsheni, nasekugezeni, ekuqondisweni komsebenzi wesikole nokubayisa emisebenzini ehlukahlukene yangaphandle.
Uma wazi ekujuleni kwalokho ubudlelwano bakho nomlingani wakho sebuphelile , ungazizwa sengathi kufanele unamathele ngoba umcabango wokuhlukanisa leyo misebenzi yokunakekela izingane ngokuqhubekayo kungaba yiphupho elibi ngokuphelele.
Ikakhulukazi uma usuvele uthwele iningi laleyo misebenzi ngokwakho: ungathuka ukuthi uzoba ngaphansi kwengcindezi enkulu ongeke ukwazi ukuyisingatha, futhi kuzoba lula kuwo wonke umuntu uma nihlala ndawonye.
Ngaphandle kwalokho, ungaba nengane enezidingo ezikhethekile, noma lowo obhekene nokukhathazeka okukhulu.
Ezimweni ezinjengalezi, ungahle uzizwe sengathi kufanele udele injabulo yakho nenhlalakahle yakho ngenxa yabo: ukuthi ukunakekelwa kwabo kuyinto eza kuqala, futhi kufanele nje udlulise ukucindezeleka kwakho kwansuku zonke nokudangala ngenxa yokunakekelwa kwabo .
Into ukuthi, izingane ziqala ukungezwani phakathi kwabazali bazo kalula, futhi bayakwazi ukusho lapho usizi.
Okunye okufanele bakucabangele uhlobo lwesibonelo obakhombisa lona mayelana nokuthi ubudlelwano babantu abadala obuphilile bubukeka kanjani.
Khumbula ukuthi bafunda ngokubuka, futhi uma bekhula endaweni engakhululeki, eshubile, enentukuthelo, bangakhula bekholelwa ukuthi yilokhu nje ubudlelwano bubukeka.
Bangaze bagcine belandela ezinyathelweni zakho, bephinda izinketho zakho zempilo njengezabo.
Ingabe yilokhu okufunayo?
Nakulokhu futhi, impendulo yakho konke lokhu ukuthembeka… okuvame ukuba yinto enzima kakhulu ukubhekana nayo, ingasaphathwa eyokukhuluma ngayo.
Thembeka kuwe uqobo ukuthi ungakwenza yini lokhu isikhathi eside ngaphandle kokulimaza unomphela inhlalakahle yakho.
Khuluma nomlingani wakho mayelana nokuthi uzizwa kanjani - maningi amathuba okuthi nabo bazizwa befana, kepha abakwazanga ukubamba isibindi sokukhuluma nawe futhi.
Futhi okubaluleke kakhulu, thembeka ezinganeni zakho, ikakhulukazi mayelana nokuthi akukho kulokhu 'iphutha' labo, kepha kunalokho kuyingxenye nje yempilo.
Bakhumbuze ukuthi nobabili niyabathanda futhi niyabeseka ngaphandle kwemibandela, futhi nizosebenzisana ukuqinisekisa ukuthi bahlala bejabule futhi bephilile.
Kukhona njalo izixazululo uma kukhulunywa ngamalungiselelo okugcina / wokukhulisa izingane kanye nemithwalo yemfanelo, ikakhulukazi uma umndeni owengeziwe ungasiza.
Eminye imindeni yenza kahle ngohlelo “lwesonto elilodwa elinomzali oyedwa / isonto elilodwa nelinye” (okunika umzali ngamunye njalo elinye isonto ukwenza imisebenzi yakhe).
kwenzekeni ku-jeff iso elinobuhlakani
Futhi, uma wena nomlingani wakho nisazwana kahle, ningahlangana njengeqembu lezinsuku zokuzalwa nezinye izikhathi.
UNGAKWENZA lokhu kusebenze. Kuzothatha nje isibindi nokwethembeka ukwenza kwenzeke.
Ungahle uthande (i-athikili iyaqhubeka ngezansi):
- Uma Ushadile Futhi Unesizungu, Nakhu Okudingeka Ukwenze
- Izindlela Ezingu-16 Zokubuyisela Ubudlelwano Bakho / Umshado Wakho Ku-Track
- Azikho izizathu ze-Bullsh * t Kungani Abesifazane Beshiya Abesilisa Ababathandayo
- Ukuwa Ngothando: Kusayina Izimpawu Zakho Ezi-5 Ngabo
- Uthando Langempela Aluhlali Njalo Isikhathi Sokuphila (Futhi Kulungile)
3. Awukwazi Ukwazi Ukuhamba
Kunezizathu ezingenakubalwa zokuthi kungani umuntu angahle adonse kanzima ngokwezezimali, kusuka ezindabeni zempilo yomuntu siqu noma izibopho zomndeni kuye ekungasebenzi ngokungalindelekile ngenkathi ehlala edolobheni elibizayo.
Ukubhekana nosizi lwemali kunzima ngokwanele, kepha kuba nzima kakhulu lapho uzizwa ubhajwe ebuhlotsheni futhi ngokoqobo awukwazi ukubushiya.
Izinguquko empilweni zibiza imali. Ukonga imali yokuqala neyenyanga edlule yokuqasha amafulethi kungasabisa ngokwanele, ungalokothi ukhathalele imali yabameli, ukunakekelwa kwezingane, njll.
Uma usuvele ukuzwa i-claustrophobic , ukuntuleka kwezimali zokwenza ushintsho kwenzeke kungenza lokhu okuhlangenwe nakho kube nzima.
Kulesi simo, kungakuhle ukuthi uthembeke emndenini wakho, kubangani, nakumbuthano womphakathi, bese ucela usizo lwabo.
Lokhu akusho ukucela ukunikezwa kwezezimali: ungathola ukuthi othile unefulethi elishibhile okwamanje elingenamuntu. Noma omunye umuntu angakuxhuma nomsebenzi. Noma ukunakekelwa kwezingane okungabizi. Uthola umqondo.
Sibekelwe ukukholwa ukuthi sidinga ukulima ngabo bonke ubunzima bempilo sisodwa, kepha akekho umuntu oyisiqhingi.
Ungasiza abanye ngenjabulo uma bebekudinga, akunjalo?
Ngakho-ke ncika kumbuthano wakho bese ubavumela ukuthi bakunakekele nawe.
Uma ungazi ukuthi uzoqala kuphi ngalokhu, hlola incwadi ka-Amanda Palmer Ubuciko Bokubuza: Ngifunde Kanjani Ukuyeka Ukukhathazeka Futhi Vumela Abantu Basize ukuthola amanye amathiphu.
4. Ungasaba Okuzayo Okulandelayo (Njengokuba Wedwa 'Phakade')
Uma ubusebudlelwaneni isikhathi eside, maningi amathuba okuthi ukhululekile ekuhlelweni kwakho.
Ungahle ube nekhaya elithokomele, uzwana kahle nabasekhweni lakho, futhi ubudlelwano bakho bungalingana njengesicathulo esidala.
Noma leso sicathulo sigcwele izimbobo futhi sikhuhla isithende sakho siluhlaza, usazi kahle, futhi ungazizwa sengathi ukungakhululeki kufanelekile ukulingana okufanelekile.
Ushintsho luyesabeka, futhi abantu abaningi bakholelwa ukuthi ukubekezelela ukuzizwa ungajabule futhi ubhajwe kungcono ngandlela thile - noma lula - kunokuziphonsa ezinxushunxushwini zokuqala kabusha.
Lokhu kuyiqiniso ikakhulukazi emibhangqwaneni esekhulile, nalabo ababhekene nezinkinga ezinkulu zezempilo.
Wena noshade naye nikwazi ukuchitha sonke isikhathi senu emagumbini okulala ahlukene, futhi nizwanane ezikhaleni ezabiwe, kodwa basazokuqhubela ezindaweni zokunakekelwa kwezempilo futhi basize ukunakekela ngeziphonso ezinzima.
Lesi sona isimo sigcina abantu abaningi ebudlelwaneni obungakhululekile.
lapho umyeni wakho ekushiya waya komunye umfazi
Nobabili kungenzeka ukuthi anizwani, kepha kukhona ubudlelwane obuhle lapho, naphezu kokubambelela.
Kepha kunethezeke kangakanani, empeleni?
Ukwesaba nokunethezeka akufanele kube kuphela kwezizathu zokugcina impilo eyabiwe nomunye umuntu.
idwala netshe liyabanda
Lokho akulungile kuwe, noma kubo.
Uma unezinkinga ezibucayi zezempilo ezikwenza uthuke, cabanga ngendlu yokuhlala osizwayo. Uzoba nokuzimela nesikhala sakho, kepha kukhona abahlinzeki bezempilo abahlala kusayithi, abatholakala ngokuchofoza inkinobho.
Ngokufanayo, uma wesaba ukuhlala wedwa, cabanga ngabantu ohlala nabo esikhundleni salokho. Nakulokhu futhi, unesikhala sakho, kepha kuzoba nabanye abantu ozohlanganyela nabo futhi wabelane ngemisebenzi yasendlini nezindleko.
Uma umane wesaba okungaziwa, ungafisa ukugxila ekubeni khona.
Akekho kithi owaziyo okulandelayo, kepha ukuba khona nokucabangisisa kungasiza kakhulu.
Zama ukufunda incwadi kaPema Chödrön Ukunethezeka ngokungaqiniseki: Izimfundiso eziyi-108 Zokuhlakulela Ukwesaba Nobubele ukuthola izeluleko ezithile eziwusizo.
5. Usuvele Wakubona Ukuthi Ungashadi
Kungathatha isikhathi eside ngathi ukuqonda kahle ukuthi singobani, njengabantu ngabanye.
Lokhu kungaholela kuzo zonke izinhlobo zokushintsha kwempilo, kusuka ekuvuseleleni okukhulu komsebenzi kuye ekuguqulweni kobulili.
Amanye ala ma-epiphanies angathatha amashumi eminyaka ukuwaqaphela, futhi lokho kulungile impela. Eqinisweni, ukwazi ukuthi singobani ngempela kuyisici esiyinhloko ohambweni lwethu lwempilo.
Impela, kungaba nzima ukwamukela lokho esiyikho, ikakhulukazi uma ukuphila ngeqiniso lethu kusho ukuthi kungahle kuhlukanise abanye abantu abasondelene nathi, kodwa ukuthembeka kithi kusho ukuthi sizojabula kakhulu ngokuhamba kwesikhathi.
Lokhu kuhlangana kanjani nokuzizwa ubhajwe ebudlelwaneni?
Kulula impela, abanye abantu bayabona ngokuhamba kwesikhathi ukuthi bakhetha ukungashadi kuphela.
Bathanda ukuphila izimpilo zabo ngokwemibandela yabo, esikhaleni sabo, ngaphandle kokuxhumana njalo (noma ukuyekethisa) nabanye abantu.
Bangakuthola kunzima ukwenzela abanye indawo ezimpilweni zabo, futhi bajabule kakhulu ekubeni bodwa, ukuzihlalela nabangane ngokwemibandela yabo, nokubuyela ekhaya ukuthula okungaphazanyiswa nomngane wezilwane nencwadi enhle.
Futhi lokho kusebenza ngokuphelele.
Futhi, ikhambi lapha ukwethembeka: nawe, nomlingani wakho.
Uma okuwukuphela kwendlela onokwaneliseka ngayo ngempela ukuba wedwa, yiba wedwa.
Inqubo yokwehlukanisa ngeke ibe mnandi, impela, kepha kuzoholela ekutheni ube nesikhala osidinga kakhulu, futhi umlingani wakho uzokhululeka ukuthola umuntu abazoxhumana naye ngendlela abamdinga ngayo.
Ngabe awunaso isiqiniseko sokwenza ngomshado wakho? Xoxa ku-inthanethi kuchwepheshe wezobudlelwano ovela ku-Relationship Hero ongakusiza ukuthola izinto. Kalula.
