Ukuzimela kulapho umuntu ezibona njengofanelwe amalungelo angatholakali. Laba ngabantu abakholelwa ukuthi impilo ibakweleta okuthile umvuzo, isilinganiso sempumelelo, izinga elithile lokuphila.
brock lesnar vs umbukiso omkhulu 2015
Mhlawumbe ungatshela lapho usebenza nomuntu onjalo ngoba bazobonisa izici ezi-5 ezilandelayo.
1. Njengezinhlamvu zamagama, ngiza ngaphambi kuka-U.
Umuzwa welungelo uletha nesimo sokungaguquguquki. Kukhona ukungabi nokuqonda ngezidingo zabanye nezimo ezithile zenhlalo, okuhambisana nokulindela ukuthi kufanele ube nentshisekelo enkulu empilweni yabo kunaleyo abayithandayo.
I-Narcissism kusenhliziyweni yalesi sici umuzwa okweqile wokuzibona uhambisana nemicabango yamandla, ubuhle nobukhazikhazi. Ukuyekethisa, okudinga ukuthi umuntu ahlangane nabanye maphakathi, akukho ezweni labanelungelo. Wonke umuntu mncintiswano - usongela impumelelo yakhe - noma awubalulekile.
Ukucabanga kwekhanda, ukuphoqa ‘indlela yami noma indlela ephezulu’ kuyimfanelo evamile. Indlela ebheke empumelelweni iyaqashwa futhi iyalandelwa. Le mfundo ingahle ibathelele, kepha abazi nhlobo ngokubulawa kwabantu okwenzeka, futhi baphika ngokuphelele ngokubamba noma yini umthwalo wabo wemfanelo ngezenzo zabo .
Inkolelo yokuthi ‘kumayelana nami’ ivame ukufakwa ekhaya, lapho, njengezingane, abazali babo babenza babe isikhungo sendawo yonke. Ngokudabukisayo, indlela yabo eya ekuvuthweni ayihambelani nokukhula kozwelo lwabo. Imvamisa, abanelungelo lokuzibamba babhajwe emqondweni ocishe ufane nentsha ezithandayo.
2. Okungokwakho nokwami kungokwami.
Izindinganiso eziphindwe kabili ezisuselwa kumuzwa welungelo zingazwakala zidida emphakathini owakhelwe ekubuyisaneni. Ngenkathi bengavumi ukucela izicelo zabanye, abantu abanelungelo lokuzifunela benza izimfuno ezingezona ezingokoqobo, abaqapheli ukuthi injabulo yabo siqu iza ngezindleko zomunye umuntu. Cabanga nje lowo muntu omvulele umnyango, kepha ongakaze akuvulele wona, noma ngabe izingalo zakho zigcwele ngokuphelele.
Isimo sengqondo sokungabongi sivame ukuqondiswa kuwe ngemuva kokuthi ubenzele isenzo esihle. Ungahlala ushintsha iphethini yakho yokushintsha ukwamukela amaholide / izingane / ama-aphoyintimenti abo, ngokwesibonelo, kepha abakaze bathembise ukubuyisa umusa, noma ngabe uwudinga ngempela. Abanelungelo lokuzibiza bavame ukubonakala bengakuqapheli nakancane ukuphazamiseka abakudalele kona.
Ngokwengeziwe, ubudlelwano babo buvame ukuba uhlangothi olulodwa futhi zingaba ngendlela emangalisayo ukuvilapha . Izinkambiso ezilindelwe emphakathini azenziwanga, njengokungasizi ukugeza izitsha ngemuva kokudla okuphekelwe bona, noma ukuthatha ithuba labo lokwenza ikhofi ehhovisi. Ukuthuthukiswa komqondo wokwabelana akukwenzeki. Ngokugxila nokuzimisela kwengane eneminyaka emibili ubudala, alikho ihlazo noma icala elinciphisa izidingo zabo.
3. Ukulindelwa kwelungelo kukhulu kakhulu kushiya ukulingana kuzwakala njengokucindezelwa.
Umuzwa wokuphakama uhlala kulowo onelungelo lokuzibiza. Banezinhloso zokuqala ukusuka phezulu kwesitebhisi, ngaphandle kwendlela ejwayelekile yokuxhunyelelwa, ezansi ezansi ethathwa abanye abaningi.
Wake waba nomuntu osikiwe phambi kwakho kulayini wesuphamakethe, noma abeke indawo yokuhlala ‘ekuthengeni ngaphambi kokudla’ indawo yokudlela esheshayo - akushiye nokudla kodwa ungenasihlalo? Kuyacasula! Kufanele ubheke ngokujulile, ngoba ukulindelwa kwelungelo kungafihlwa ngokuyisisekelo salokho esiyikho: izinga eliphakeme lokukhokha ngenxa yobulili, ukuphathwa okukhethekile ebha ngenxa yobudala, noma ithuba lomphakathi ngenxa yobuhlanga noma isigaba.
Babheka impumelelo yabo ngenkathi ngasikhathi sinye bebukela phansi okwakho, bakha ekhanda labo 'ukuzithethelela' ngokulindela kwabo ilungelo. Njengomzali, uzosheshe uthole ukuthi yibaphi abanye abazali 'abazokuthatha' ngenjabulo isipho sokugibela esivela kuwe, lapho uJohnny omncane enomcimbi wephathi. Lolu hlelo lusebenza kahle uma nobabili nishintshana ngokushayela. Noma kunjalo 'abathathi' abathile ababonakali neze benethuba lokuphindisela. Ezimweni lapho bephoqeleka khona ukuthi bathathe ithuba labo, bakwenza ngokumangazayo, baqinisekise ukuthi wonke umuntu uyazi 'ngesenzo sabo esikhulu'.
Yilo mqondo welungelo ogcina uzilimazile. Ekugcineni, siyaziqhelelanisa nabantu abanjalo ukunciphisa umkhawulo wezenzo zabo kithi. Lolu hlobo lokuziphatha luzobonakala luqhutshwa ngombono ongenangqondo ngomhlaba, ohlanganisa ukucabanga kwezimo zokuphila ezifanele nokwelashwa.
Ungahle uthande (i-athikili iyaqhubeka ngezansi):
ngubani bray wyatt mfowethu
- Izizathu Ezi-9 Abazibiza Ngazo Abahlale Bejabule
- Izizathu eziyi-9 zokuthi kungani ungafanele uphole umuntu ohahayo
- Ungayilwa Kanjani Umqondo Oweqile WeLungelo
- Izindlela Ezi-7 Umuntu Ovuthiwe Ngokomzwelo Uphatha Abantu Abanzima
- Ngabe Uyiphutha iMachiavellianism YeNarcissism?
- Izimpawu ze-9 Zabantu Abangabongiyo (+ Ungabhekana Kanjani Nazo)
4. Indoda / owesifazane othukuthele, ozwa ukuthi intukuthelo yakhe ilungile.
Abanamalungelo okuzimela abasibo abantu abangaziwa lapho bezobhekana. Imvamisa kwaziwa ngokufutheka kolaka okudlula noma ikuphi ukucasuka ingane engakuphonsa, ukuma kwabo okunonya, nokuzikhukhumeza kubenza bakholwe ukuthi lokhu kufanelekile. ‘Angikholwa ukuthi kufanele ngisebenze ngezimonyonyo ezinje’ nokunye ukuqhuma okungafanele okugeleza kanjalo kuphuma ngokukhululeka emilonyeni yabo.
Intukuthelo yabo ingavutha ngokungenzi lutho futhi, ukusika noma ukusonga amehlo kukhombisa ukwedelela kwabo labo ababazungezile. Ukunganaki okubonakalayo kuboniswa ku imibono yokugxeka negxeka ngokweqile . Abazinelungelo labo, ngokwesibonelo, abasoze bakudumisa ngokwenyuswa kwakho esikhundleni, bakholelwa (futhi bakwenze kucace) ukuthi ukuthole ngoba 'ubusondelene nomphathi wakho / umhlabeleli weqembu elibi / cishe ngesikhathi okhushulwe ngaso'.
Intukuthelo, neminye imizwa eguquguqukayo ehambisana nomuzwa wokufaneleka, ivame ukubhebhethekiswa yihlazo eliyimbangela. Imaski yelungelo ingasetshenziselwa ukumboza isidingo esijulile. Njengabahlukumezi abaningi, intukuthelo okuveziwe kwabanye kuvame ukuxoshwa ekuvikelekeni kwabo.
5. Ngimncane kabi.
Lapho ukuziphatha okunamandla, okunolaka kungabasizi abanelungelo lokuzifeza ukufinyelela izinhloso zabo, kungahle kuvele icala lokuthi ‘ngimpofu’. Isimo sengqondo sokuzidabukisa esihambisana nokukhohlisa kanye ukuziphatha okufuna ukunakwa kwenza inkampani yabo idonse.
Yize kudliwe yinkolelo yokuthi imithetho yezenhlalo ayisebenzi kuyo, ungaqiniseka ukuthi bazokhononda kakhulu uma bezwa ukuthi bayashintshwa! Lokhu kuvame ukuvusa ikhanda emsebenzini weqembu. Ake sithi iqembu lenu lenza isethulo ndawonye. Umuntu oyedwa uyahluleka ukuhlangabezana nesabelo sakhe somsebenzi onzima. Kodwa-ke yena lowo muntu ulindele inani elikhulu kakhulu lesikweletu lapho iphrojekthi iqhubeka kahle. Ngaphezu kwalokho, lowo muntu uzolahla umkhumbi ocwilayo uma engakwenzi. Lokhu kungavame ukutholakala ekuziphatheni lapho 'okufunwayo' kwabo kuvezwa 'njengezidingo'. Bayichaza kabi imizwa yabo njengamaqiniso futhi abanye bavame ukusolwa ngenxa yesimo abazithola bekuso. Ukulindela kwabo okungafinyelelwanga kubashiya bezizwa benganelisekile futhi bedumele okungapheli.
Ngale kwakho konke lokhu kuziphatha umuntu ofisa ukunconywa nokukhulekelwa. Bahlale bedinga ukuqinisekiswa kontanga yabo, kanti ngasikhathi sinye bafuna inhlonipho. Ngakho-ke kugcwele ukungazethembi, kungukukhathazeka kwabo ngokomzwelo abazama ukukuxazulula ngokusebenzisa ukuphumelela kwabo. Izimfanelo ezilimazayo emphakathini zibahlukanisile nomphakathi, futhi ekugcineni, ngisho nalabo abaseduze nabathandekayo bafunda ukuzibamba. Ukudana kungangena lapho udonga lokuzimela luqala ukudilika.
Amandla angokomzwelo ayisisekelo okuzimela kwabanye adinga ukuphathwa. Ukunikeza ihembe emhlane wakho bekungeke kwanele. Bona lapho udonselwa esimweni 'sokunganqobi' bese uzikhipha ngobumnene. ‘Cha, ngiyaxolisa angikwazi ukuhlangana ngo-4.00 ntambama. Singaphinda sihlehlisele ku-5.00… ’ Qina, kodwa ungakhethi . Ukuyekethisa maphakathi nengxenye kuwe kwanele, kepha dweba umugqa futhi ukulungele ukuhamba.
Manje ukuphonsa iso lakho emphefumulweni wakho. Ngokwezinga elithile, sonke sinomuzwa wokuthi sinelungelo ngaphakathi kwethu, kodwa njengezici eziningi zobuntu, sihlala ezindaweni ezahlukahlukene ngesilinganiso esishibilikayo. Ingabe uyazinaka izidingo zabanye? Khombisa ukuqaphela imizwa nezimo zabanye abantu? Ngabe uyakwazi ukuxolela labo abakwenza ngokungafanele noma ngenhloso noma ngobudedengu? Izici ezinesihloko zingaphakathi kithi sonke, singakwazi ukulungisa ibhalansi ngokuthobeka nangokubonga. Injabulo yethu yomuntu siqu neyomphakathi incike kuyo.
