Siyakuhalalisela ngokukhulisela izingane zakho ebudaleni!
Ugijime i-gauntlet futhi uphuma uphumelela, futhi manje usunomuntu okhule ngokugcwele osebenza ezandleni zakho.
… Ngakho kungani bengakafiki?
Ngokuzimisela, lolu wudaba abazali abaningi ababhekana nalo, futhi yilolo ababengalulindelanga ngenkathi benyathela uJunior enkulisa.
Ngemuva kwakho konke, angithi wonke umuntu omdala osemncane akaphuphi inkululeko azokuba nayo lapho ebalekela indlu yabazali babo, nayo yonke leyo mithetho elindayo nokulindelwe?
imali ebhange 2011
Uma ngabe ingane yakho ayikaphumi, kungenzeka ukuthi ukhungatheka kakhulu ngosuku.
Noma ngabe bakudla ngaphandle kwendlu nasekhaya, noma bakwenza uhlanye ngalokhu abazama ukukudlulisa njengomculo, kwanele.
Kungcono ukubakhipha futhi bodwa ngaphambi kokuba ubuhlobo bakho nabo bonakaliswe unomphela.
Ngakho-ke, futhi, sibuza umbuzo olula: kungani besekhona, futhi yini ongayenza ngakho?
1. Ingabe Bakulungele Ngempela Ukuhamba?
Abantu bavuthwa ngamanani ahlukene, futhi ngenxa yalokho, bazoba namazinga ahlukene okulungela uma kukhulunywa ngokuntywila ezweni elikhulu laphaya.
Ngabe ingane yakho yethukile ngokwethembeka ngethemba lokuthi izobhekana nempilo ezimele?
Noma banomqondo osuthuthuke ngokwedlulele wokuthola amalungelo kanye nokwenqabela uhlobo lomsebenzi onzima odingekayo ukuze baphile (futhi baphumelele) bebodwa?
Kunezici ezingenakubalwa ezingena ekukhuleni komuntu jikelele, futhi lokhu kufaka phakathi izindaba ezehlukene zomzimba, ezingokomzwelo nezingokwengqondo.
Singalindela ukuthi umuntu oneminyaka engama-20 ubudala abe ngumuntu oqedile ngokuphelele, ozimele, kepha lokho kungenzeka kungabi njalo uma kufanele babhekane nokukhathazeka okukhubazayo, noma inkinga yezempilo engalapheki.
Kuyafana-ke uma ingane yakho ikumkhakha we-autism, noma uma inolwazi olunzulu impela.
Umuntu oguqula ubulili, ngokwesibonelo, angahle adinge ukwesekwa okungokomzwelo okuvela kumama nobaba ngaphambi kokuba bakulungele ukubhekana nezwe.
Ngokuphambene nalokho, umuntu obezimele ngonya kusukela ebusheni bakhe angahle aphume emnyango ngokushesha lapho sekusemthethweni ukuba abaleke.
Zinike isikhathi sokucabanga ngempela ukuthi kungani ingane yakho ingaphumi.
Uma bewuhlobo olubucayi oluba netwetwe emcabangweni wokuzenzela ama-aphoyintimenti wamazinyo kabili ngonyaka, mhlawumbe basekhona ngoba bayesaba ukuzondla.
Uma, noma kunjalo, bengafuni nje ukuphuma ngoba lokho kusho ukuthi kuzodingeka basebenzise imali yabo ezintweni ezibhekele icky esikhundleni semidlalo yevidiyo, izimonyo, nezindawo zokudlela, sekuyisikhathi sokubenza.
2. Isanqante vs. Induku
Ngabe ingane yakho isabela kangcono kuzikhuthazo, noma ukwehluleka?
Uma kungokwangaphambili, ukubanikeza imivuzo ngokuphuma endlini kungahle kusizakale ngokwenza lokho kwenzeke.
Isibonelo, uma balks ngomqondo wokuhamba ngoba bebegcina imali yokuhamba, unganikela ngokubasiza ukukhokhela ithikithi labo.
Noma unikele ngemfundo yabo, noma imoto abayilondolozela yona, noma idatha yocingo yonyaka, njll.
Thatha okuthile abakwazisa kakhulu noma abakubheke phambili, ubanikeze kona njengomvuzo wokukhipha isihogo endlini yakho ukuze ube nokuthula nokuzola okudingeka kakhulu.
Ngokuphambene, uma bethatha isinyathelo kuphela uma kukhona uhlobo oluthile lokungaphatheki kahle okuhilelekile, ungathola ubuciko.
Yini ebagcina bezungezile? Ngabe ubenzela konke ukuwashela? Ngabe bathanda ngokuphelele ukuzihlalela echibini elingasemuva kwegceke lakho?
Noma ingabe balutheka ngempela iresiphi yakho yemilingo yenyama?
Uma ingane yakho esikhulile ingahambi ngoba ikuthanda ukupheka kwakho, yeka ukupheka.
Batshele ukuthi ubulokhu ugqilaza ekhishini amashumi eminyaka manje uzosebenzisa iminyaka yakho yasekwindla uphila ngezikhalazo ezenziwe ngaphambilini.
Uma befuna ukudla, kuzofanele baziphekele. Bona ukuthi kubathatha isikhathi esingakanani ukuthuthela endaweni enezinketho ezinhle zokuthatha.
Okulandelayo kuyizinhlobonhlobo zezinto ezahlukahlukene ongazama ukubacindezela baphume endlini.
Amanye asuselwa kumvuzo, amanye angamabhuzu ngemuva.
Zibheke bese unquma ukuthi iyiphi yazo (noma iyiphi inhlanganisela yayo) engasebenza kangcono ngesimo sakho.
3. Igumbi Lokushaja NeBhodi (Futhi Setha Imithetho Yasekhaya)
Le enye inketho 'yenduku' yezinhlobo ezinenkani ezijabulela impilo enhle obanikeza yona.
Nquma izindleko zokuqasha igumbi labo, kanye nemali yokugcinwa kwendlu, ukudla, kanye nayo yonke enye insizakalo obanikeza yona.
Uma befaka isandla ekuphekeni nasekuhlanzeni, kungaba kuncane… kepha uma empeleni ungumpheki wabo nomsebenzi wasendlini, bakhokhise ngazo zonke izinsizakalo zakho.
Ngaphezu kwalokho, setha inqwaba yemithetho sengathi uqhuba indlu yokuhlala. Setha amahora amukelekile okuvakasha ezivakashi, isikhathi sokubekwa ekhaya se-TV, nokunye okunjalo.
Uma beshaqekile futhi bekwenqena lokho okubabeka kukho, maningi amathuba okuthi baphume ukuze bakwazi ukuzimela ngokushesha.
Ngemuva kwakho konke, lapho useyingane, akukho okunye ongakwenza ngaphandle kokulalela imithetho yabazali bakho.
Inzuzo eyodwa yokuba mdala yikhono lokuzibekela imithetho futhi uphile ngezinqumo zakho.
Ngakwesokudla? Kwesokudla. Siqhubekela phambili.
4. Bathole Usizo Uma Baludinga
Emaphethelweni wesanqante we-spectrum kuyindlela yokusiza ingane yakho iphume uma ngobuqotho inesikhathi esinzima sayo.
kungani dean ambrose ashiye wwe
Ingabe ingane yakho ibambekile ekhaya ngoba inenkinga yokuthola umsebenzi?
Bangase bazizwe becindezeleke ngempela ngakho, futhi ukuba ubasize cishe kuzobenza bazizwe sengathi behluleke nakakhulu emehlweni akho.
Lokhu kuyiqiniso ikakhulukazi uma befuna ukuthi uziqhenye ngabo, kepha qhubeka uthole izaziso zokwenqatshwa (uma bekwenza nakwingxoxo).
Uma kunjalo, xhumanisa nomeluleki wezemisebenzi kanye / noma i-ejensi yokubeka umsebenzi.
Noma, uma lokho kuzwakala kukubi kakhulu, banikeze inqwaba yamawebhusayithi nezinye izinsiza bese ubavumela ukuba bafinyelele kuma-ejensi abazizwa besondelene kakhulu nawo.
Ngaleyo ndlela basebenzelana nomuntu omdala osizayo ongeyena umama noma ubaba, kepha usengabasiza ukuthi baqhubekele phambili lapho bafuna / badinga ukuba khona.
Okufanayo kuya ekutholeni indawo yokuhlala. Uma ufuna ukuthi inzalo yakho ethandekayo ikwazi ukuzimela ngokwengeziwe, vumela lokho kuzimela kuqale ngokuqinisekisa ukuthi bathola indawo yabo yokuhlala.
Ngaphandle kwalokho, ungahle ubhekane nethuba lokuthi bazokucasula ngokubakhethela ikhaya labo elisha.
Uma abangane babo bengelona usizo kulokhu, bathole ukuthi bakhulume nabasebenzela ukuqasha abangakwazi ukuhlanganisa ukukhethwa kwamafulethi abangahle bawahlole.
Abanye abantu empeleni balahlekile ngokumangalisayo uma kukhulunywa ngalezi zimo, futhi ngokuthembeka konke, ingabe lokho kuyamangaza?
Ukuba mdala okugcwele kugcwele izibalo eziningi ezingenakubalwa, kusukela emisebenzini yokuqala yangempela nasemafulethini ukuya ekuhambeni komhlaba wonke, ubudlelwano obubucayi nokuhlelwa kwempilo yesikhathi eside.
Akunandaba ukuthi ucabanga ukuthi uyilungiselela kangakanani ingane le nto, kusekuningi abazobe bekuzulazula okokuqala ngqa.
Ungahle uthande (i-athikili iyaqhubeka ngezansi):
- Ungamisa Kanjani Ukunika Amandla Ingane Yakho Esikhulile
- Ungabhekana Kanjani Nengane Ekhulile Engahloniphi: I-7 Azikho Izeluleko Zombhedo!
- Ungazethemba Kanjani Ngezinyathelo Ezilula Ezi-5
- Codependency Vs Caring: Ukwehlukanisa phakathi Kokulimazayo Nokusizayo
5. Beka Imingcele Yomuntu Siqine
Ngabe uthola ukuthi ukhokhela zonke izidingo zengane yakho, kusukela kwisibonelelo sansuku zonke kuye ekugqokeni, ekudleni, nasekuzijabuliseni?
Uma wenza kanjalo ngaphandle kokufaka iphenathi, futhi kungekho mithetho eyisisekelo yokuthi uzobakhokhela kanjani, kungani emhlabeni bebeyofuna ukuhamba?
Vele wazi ukuthi uma ubanqamula ngokungazelelwe ngokwezezimali, bangasabela kabi kakhulu.
okufanele ukwenze endlini yakho lapho unesithukuthezi
Ngemuva kwakho konke, uma ubeka isibonelo futhi ngokuzumayo ukhipha umata ngaphansi kwabo, kungenzeka bathuke futhi balimale, futhi bangakukhakhabisa ngokwenza njalo.
Lokhu kuyiqiniso ikakhulukazi uma bake babhekana nokulutha kwezidakamizwa noma utshwala esikhathini esedlule futhi bancika kuwe kakhulu, noma uma benokuphazamiseka kobuntu.
Kuleli qophelo, kubalulekile ukukwenza kucace ukuthi ukuhlukunyezwa kwanoma yiluphi uhlobo akwamukelekile. Vele, lokhu kufaka phakathi kwabo bobabili, nokwakho.
Ngabe ingane yakho iphatha ikhaya lakho njengehostela, iletha abangani bakho nabalingani bezothando kuwo wonke amahora emini nasebusuku?
Ingabe uzizwa ungahlonishwa? Bake bakusabisa noma bakwenza uzizwe ungaphephile ekhaya lakho?
Uma kunjalo, badinga ukukhipha isihogo ngokushesha. Lolu hlobo lokuziphatha akumele lubekezelelwe, futhi unelungelo lonke lokukhahlela unqenqema lomgwaqo, futhi uze uthole nosizo emaphoyiseni uma kudingeka.
Ngakolunye uhlangothi, zibuze ukuthi ngabe ulungile futhi unesizotha kulo muntu osemusha.
Uma benenkinga yokuthola umsebenzi, bangahle bacindezeleke futhi badangele.
Ukuhlala ubahlukumeza futhi ubabiza ngokuthi ama-parasite noma i-leech ngeke kubashukumisele ekusebenzeni ngomlingo ngandlela thile, futhi ngeke kwenze umsebenzi omkhulu uvele ezandleni zabo.
Nquma ukuthi ngabe usekhasini elifanayo uma kuziwa ekunikezeni ugqozi nokusekelwa.
Ungahle ukhuthazwe othile okukhonkotha njengosayitsheni we-drill, kepha ingane yakho ingaba uhlobo olubucayi. (Noma okuphambene nalokho.)
6. Zilungiselele Ukwemukela Ezinye Zezinsolo
Uma izingane zakho zingakasuki ekhaya okwamanje, futhi azibhekene nokungasebenzi / ukungasebenzi, izinkinga zempilo yengqondo / yomzimba, noma ukuntuleka kwezindlu ezitholakalayo, kunesinye isici esikhulu esidinga ukucatshangelwa: wena.
Ingabe uwuhlobo lomzali okwenzele yonke into ingane yakho, kunokufaka umthwalo wemfanelo nokuzimela?
Uma kunjalo, kungenzeka ubenzile (futhi usaqhubeka) ukubenza kabi kakhulu.
Ungase ucabange ukuthi ungumzali onomusa omangalisayo, ophanayo, okhathalelayo ngokuwasha izingubo nokunakekela konke ukupheka nokuwahlanzela, kepha empeleni ubagcina besesimweni sentuthuko eboshiwe.
Kungani bengathatha noma yisiphi isinyathelo sokuzenzela noma yini uma uzenzela konke?
Yini engaba nogqozi?
Imisebenzi yasekhaya ingacasula. Ukupheka kungaba nzima, uma bengazange bafundiswe ukuthi bangakwenza kanjani lokho besebancane. Ukukhula kungacindezela.
Uyabona inkinga lapha?
Ngeke nje kuphela bahlakulele umuzwa wokuzimela, kodwa uma bengena ebudlelwaneni obubucayi futhi behlala nomlingani wabo, ngeke basukume futhi banakekele isabelo sabo esifanele semithwalo yemfanelo yekhaya.
Uma bengenasibopho semisebenzi yasekhaya ngenkathi besekhaya, ngeke bafunde ukuthi bazi kanjani okufanele kwenziwe.
Abakaze banake lezo zinto phambilini, futhi kunzima impela ukukufunda lokho ebudaleni.
Uma izingubo ezihlanzekile zivele ngomlingo ekhabethe labo, futhi kwenziwa ukudla futhi kwatholakala lapho belambile, bazolahleka impela uma sekuyisikhathi sokuthi bazame ukuzivikela.
Bafundise lokho abadinga ukukwazi, futhi bazolungela noma yini impilo ebaphonsayo.
ungadlala kanjani kanzima ukuze uthole intombazane
7. Ingabe Wena Noma Uzakwenu Wadala Lesi Simo?
Lesi ngesinye isici esidinga ukucatshangelwa ngokungathi sína.
Abantu abaningi bazuza kakhulu ngokuba nezingane zabo ezindala zihlala nabo.
Isibonelo, umzali ohlukanisile angazizwa enesizungu esincane nengane yakhe endala esahlala ekhaya.
Inzalo ithe ingabonisa isimilo 'semifantu', kepha uma lolo hlobo lokuncika ngokubambisana selusunguliwe, kunzima ukugqashula kulo.
Ungahle ungazi nokuthi ukwenzile lokhu, kepha awuneme ngesimo esivele.
Uma ukhubekise ingane yakho ngecala ukuze ihlale nawe kusihlwa ngempelasonto esikhundleni sokuhamba nabangani ngenxa yezinkinga zakho zempilo / isizungu, zingazilimaza ngoba zizizwa ziphoqelekile ukuhlala nawe.
Ngokufanayo, uma wena nomlingani wakho / oshade naye nixabene ngokukhipha ingane yakho endala ekhaya - nani niphikisana ngayo, nabo befuna ukuthi ingane ihlale - cabanga ukuthi kungenzeka ukuthi imizamo yakho ingahle ihlukunyezwe.
Ungahle ubeke imingcele eqinile, bese uthola ukuthi oshade naye uzishaya indiva ngemuva kwakho.
Lokhu kungahle kusuka ekubashenxiseleni ukheshi ngemuva kokuthi ubanqamule ukubatshela ukuthi bangakhathazeki ngemithetho yasekhaya efana nemithetho yokubekwa ekhaya, noma ukungavumeli izivakashi zasebusuku.
8. Qiniseka, Kodwa Futhi Unomusa
Ubeke ithani lesikhathi nomzamo ekubeni ngumzali, unikele ngakho konke kusuka ebuthongweni kuya esikhathini sedwa ukuze unakekele ingane yakho.
Iminjunju, imfiva, ukoma embhedeni, umentshisi wokumemeza kwentsha, amamaki aphansi, ukukhathazeka phakathi nohambo lwesikole… bekuyinto ephelele.
Manje ubheke phambili esikhaleni somuntu siqu esidingeka kakhulu, isikhathi sakho, nokuthula.
Uma ingane yakho ingathathi izinyathelo ezidingekayo ukuphuma, ungahle uzwe noma yini kusuka ekukhathazekeni kuya entukuthelweni.
Le mizwa ingabonisa ulaka nje, ubutha, nokuhlukumeza ngamazwi uma uzizwa ukhungathekile.
Yilapho ukubekezela nobubele kusebenza khona.
Sicela ukhumbule ukuthi ingane / izingane zakho azicelanga ukuza kulo mhlaba. Babengenalo igunya odabeni, futhi le ndawo igcwele ubunzima bezinkinga izizukulwane ezedlule ezingakaze zibhekane nazo.
Kungenzeka ukuthi ubafundise izisekelo ocabanga ukuthi badinga ukuziphumelela laphaya, kepha ngokungangabazeki kunezici ezingenakubalwa ababhekisisa nazo.
Amakilasi ezomnotho wasekhaya awasekho, futhi ezindaweni lapho zisanikeza khona izisekelo zokupheka nokunakekelwa kwasekhaya, azihlanganisi izihloko ezinjengebhajethi yasekhaya.
Futhi izikole eziningi eziphakeme azinikezi amakilasi ezezimali omuntu siqu, noma amathiphu okuthi ungaxoxisana kanjani ngomholo.
Imisebenzi nezindlu ezingabizi ngokufanayo ziyindlala emadolobheni amakhulu amakhulu, futhi ukuthola izindlela ezinhle kuzo zombili kungaba nzima impela… nokuyinto ongase ungalokothi ubhekane nayo ngenkathi uneminyaka yabo.
Isibonelo, lapho ngiphuma sengineminyaka eyevile kwengu-20, abazali bami babecabanga ukuthi ngangikhokha inani elilinganayo lendlu efulethini lami lase-studio ababezolikhokha eminyakeni engama-30 edlule.
Futhi bebengazi ukuthi izindleko zami zokufunda eyunivesithi ziyini, nokuthi kungani kubalulekile ukuba noxhumano lwe-inthanethi kanye nomakhalekhukhwini.
Laba ngabantu abathole imisebenzi ekhokhela kakhulu ngaphandle kwekolishi, futhi bakwazi ukukhokhela indlu enesizotha ngomholo olingene.
Izinkontileka zomsebenzi wesikhathi esigcwele ezibandakanya ukunakekelwa kwezempilo kanye nokonga umhlalaphansi bezilungele isifundo, hhayi ukuntuleka… okuhluke kakhulu emakethe yemisebenzi yanamuhla.
p> Futhi omaka beminyaka abakwazi ngempela ukusebenza.
Kungenzeka ukhuliswe ngomqondo wokuthi abantu bathola izincwadi zabo zokushayela beneminyaka engu-16, bathenga imoto ngo-18, baqede ikolishi beneminyaka engama-21, bathole umsebenzi ngokushesha, bese beshada futhi baqale umndeni lapho beneminyaka engama-30…
ukukhombisa kanjani ukwazisa ebudlelwaneni
… Kodwa lezo zikhathi ezisemqoka kakhulu azisasebenzi ngokoqobo.
“Izimpawu zobudala” ukuthi izizukulwane ezedlule zanamathela kuzo zingase zingakwazi ukufinyelela enzalweni yakho isikhathi esithile.
Lokhu akubangelwa ukuthi bayavilapha, noma ukuthi kukhona okungahambi kahle ngabo, kodwa ngoba umphakathi wanamuhla ungumzabalazo kakhulu kunokuba abantu abadala abaningi bebona.
Iningi labantu emadolobheni amakhulu manje selifanele lisebenze okungenani imisebenzi emibili ukuze likwazi ukuziphilisa, ngokuhlanganiswa komsebenzi wezinkontileka kanye nokuzimela / ukuzimela okubandakanya ukuqashwa kwabo.
Ingane yakho ingahle ibhekane nethoni yezinto lokho angikaze yaqala ukusebenza lapho wawungontanga yabo.
Izifundo zaseNyuvesi zifaka intsha eningi ezikweletini zabafundi ezikhubazekile njengoba nje kufanele ziqale empilweni, futhi nemisebenzi yezinga lokungena kuyaqabukela - uma kwenzeka - ikhokhe umholo ophilayo.
Ungalindela ingane yakho ukuthi igxume iphume ekolishi iye emsebenzini wamaphupho, ungaqapheli ukuthi kunezinkulungwane zabanye abantu abafanelekela lowo msebenzi.
Izikhathi zishintshile, futhi uma ufuna ngempela ukusiza ingane yakho ukuba izimele - futhi uphume egumbini ofuna ukuliphendulela isitudiyo se-yoga - kuzodingeka wazi ngalokhu.
Xhumana nezingane zakho, unqume izingqinamba ezingokoqobo ezizibambe ekutholeni inkululeko yabantu abadala, futhi uzisize zithathe noma yiziphi izinyathelo ezidingekayo zokuzixazulula.
Ungazindeli: qala namuhla. Khona manje.
Uma ulinda isikhathi eside ukwenza lokhu, kuzokuvela ukukhathazeka okukhulu.
Uma nisebenza ndawonye njengomndeni, ninethuba elingcono lokuthi wonke umuntu afinyelele ezinhlosweni zakhe.
Futhi uzoba neyakho impilo emuva ngaphambi kokuthi wazi.
