Kuyimpelasonto, futhi okwesihlanu othandiweyo wakho egxuma ngebhasikidi yokuwasha egcwele izingubo ezomile ngenkathi ubuka ithelevishini.
KungoLwesithathu futhi ulungiselele isidlo sakusihlwa, waze wenza nokuhlola futhi wazama okuthile okusha, kepha wena awukukhulumi futhi awukuqapheli lokhu ngesikhathi sonke sokudla.
Izinyawo zakhe zibuhlungu ngenxa yokugijima (kwesinye isikhathi ngokoqobo) ukuthumela usuku lonke. Ngesinye isikhathi - mhlawumbe ngaphambi nje kokulala - umbona nokunquma njengoba ehlikihla unyawo. 'Uyazi ukuthi lizokuna yini kusasa?' ubuza.
Iminyaka emihlanu wehla ulayini futhi isithandwa sakho asisekho. Awukho umcimbi omkhulu ozolandisa ngokuhlukana. Ubambe ongezansi.
Imvamisa izinto ezincane, hhayi ezinkulu, eziqeda ubudlelwano. Okukhulu kumane kuveze ukuthi kwakungekho buhlobo bangempela kwasekuqaleni.
Singacabanga ngozwela njengokuqapha ngokuyisisekelo. Vumela othandekayo ukuthi asizakale ngazo zonke izinzwa zakho ezinhlanu nanoma iziphi eziyimfihlo ongahle ube nazo. Lokhu kungaphezu kothandekayo oxhumana nazo zonke izidingo zabo.
Uzwela oluvunyelwayo, ikhono lokuzwela omunye nokwenza okuthile ngenhlalakahle yabo, lubaluleke kakhulu kunoma yibuphi ubudlelwano, kepha futhi kaningi alunakwa ngenxa yemidlalo engasho lutho yezimpi zamandla obudlelwano.
Awukho umlingo wokubonisa ukuzwelana nabanye, kungaba kwezothando noma ngobuciko . Uzwela alukaze lube yisifundazwe sodwa sabazwayo abayimfihlakalo phakathi kwethu. Cha, uzwela lumayelana nokwethembeka okungokomzwelo. Kuvulelekile futhi kungengesabi ukuphendula izidingo ezingakhulumi zomunye.
Abakwa-Absolutists bangathi, 'Yebo, uma umuntu efuna okuthile kufanele azikhulumele.' Kuyavunywa. Kodwa uthando lisho futhi ukuthi kwesinye isikhathi akudingeki ukuthi uthi, 'Ngicela ugcobe izinyawo zami' ukuze zikhuhle.
Kufanele wazi omunye umuntu ngaphandle kwakho uma uzokwakha ukuxhumana kulo mhlaba wethu. Akwanele ukuhlala isikhala nomunye umuntu nsuku zonke bese uzitshela ukuthi “Lokhu kuhle, lokhu kuyasebenza, lobu budlelwano obufanele,” ngoba kuyisiqinisekiso esingenakwephulwa ukuthi uma lokho kucabanga kwakho ngempela, okunye umuntu usebenzisa umugqa ofanayo wokuthi “Kumele ngiphume lapha.”
Uthando ludinga ukuhlangana kwemizwa, imicabango, kanye nezifiso ngokuvulelana okudinga ukushintshana ngokukhululekile kozwelo phakathi kwezinhliziyo ezihilelekile.
Lithini izinga lakho lokuzwelana nesithandwa sakho? Ufinyelela kanjani kuzwelo lwakho? Futhi uma usutholakele, ngabe kulindeleke ukuthi uyigcine ivuliwe, uhlale ukulungele ukuthambekela kusidingo (impendulo emfushane: cha)?
Uthola izinga lakho lozwelo ngokuzibuza ukuthi uthembeke kangakanani ngemizwa yakho. Abaningi bethu bazigcina bevalelwe ngamabhodlela ngezizathu eziningi, futhi ngezindlela eziningi ezahlukahlukene ukubonakaliswa kokuntanta kwethu okungokomzwelo bekungeke kubonise into efanayo kabili.
Impilo iyala ukuthi kuvikelwe. Lelo iqiniso elingenakugwenywa. Kuze kube yilapho sesifikile esimweni sokuqwashiswa okungaphezulu komoya, sidinga ukuvikela izingcezwana zethu ukuze lezo zingcezu zikhule ukuvikela ezinye izingcezu, kuze kube yilapho zonke izingcezwana - kunokuba zibe lukhuni nezikhali - zinothe kakhulu futhi zivundile lapho zingatshala khona ziluhlaza izinkambu ezigcwele impilo nobungqabavu. Ukuvikela kakhulu, noma kunjalo, usawoti womhlaba okuzungezile ama-hillock angomakhelwane, kunokuba utshani bawo bufinyelele ekuhlanganeni nokwakho, hamba. Kubo, ilanga likwenye indawo.
Uma, noma kunjalo, ungazitshela ukuthi akusibo ubuthakathaka ukukhombisa ukuba sengozini, ukukhathala, isidingo, isifiso, noma okungahleliwe, ukuthambekela kokukhohlisa, usukulungele ukuzivulela ekunikezeni uzwela. Usuyitholile kwabanye, uyazi ukuthi uyayithola. Futhi uyazi ukuthi uyayithanda: leyo engaceliwe yokugcoba intamo ngemuva komdlalo wethenisi wangempelasonto ama-omelets owadla ngenjabulo njalo ngeSonto ekuseni ngemuva kokuba iphunga lesidlo sasekuseni likuvuse ngendlela ongakaze ucele ngayo ikhofi lakho olithandayo lapho kugaywa ikhofi yenziwe. Izinto ezincane zibaluleke kakhulu.
Uzwela lwakha izinto ezincane. Ungaze ukubize ngokuthi ukucabangela uma igama elivame kakhulu libonakala limnandi. Kukangaki ukucabangela abanye kuke kubaxoshe?
Kepha okuphambene nalokho, ukungacabangeli, nokuntula imiphakathi eyisisekelo ekhuluma ngokuthi ungubani ngezindlela amagama angenakukwazi ukwenza, kubonile ukuhamba kwezigidi.
Ungahle uthande (i-athikili iyaqhubeka ngezansi):
- Ungabhekana Kanjani nabantu Abangahlakaniphile
- Ungabulungisa Ubuhlobo Ohlangothini Olunye Noma Kufanele Ubuphelise?
- Izimpawu Ezinkulu Ezi-6 Ozakwethu Ubona NjengeNketho, Hhayi Ukuza Kuqala
- 7 Signs Indoda Yakho Ihlushwa I-Peter Pan Syndrome
- Ungayenza Kanjani Indoda Ikuhloniphe: 11 Azikho Izeluleko Zombhedo!
- Ungabafundisa Kanjani Abantu Indlela Yokuphatha
Uma untula uzwela ebudlelwaneni bakho, ushayela enye ingxenye yakho kude kanjalo:
Inhlonipho
U-Aretha Franklin akazange acule ngalokhu ukuze nje ungakunaki. Uzwela ludlala indima enkulu ekuhlonipheni abanye, ngoba lusivumela ukuthi sibabone njengabantu abagcwaliswe ngokuphelele kunokwelulwa kwezidingo zethu. Sikuhlonipha kuphela lokho esivumela ukuthi kube 'okwangempela.'
Kodwa-ke uma singakwazi noma singafuni ukukhuluma izilimi ezingakhulunywa nabathandekayo ezimpilweni zethu, sibatshela ngokusobala ukuthi azizona ezangempela: abakhathali kakhulu bafuna ukuthi sinikele ngehlombe lethu nemizuzu embalwa Ukuthula abakudingi ukuzwa amazwi okweseka nobumbano ngemuva kokuletha izindaba zokuthi okuthile okubalulekile kubo kwehle ngesikhathi abavunyelwe ukuthuthumela futhi bamane badinge ukuthi sibabheke emehlweni abo ukubazisa ukuthi konke kuhamba kahle.
dlala kanzima ukuthola indoda
TO ukungabi naluzwela kuyinto enhle emoyeni womuntu esimthandayo ememezela ukuthi asibahloniphi.
Kwazise
Uma singakwazi ukuzwelana nomunye, thina bathathe kancane : ilondolo liwashwa ngomlingo lilahlwe noma ngabe othandekayo ngandlela thile ekwazi ukutadisha isidlo sakusihlwa kungenzeka futhi ukuthi kube i-drip emthanjeni kukho konke ukucatshangelwa esikunikeza ekulungisweni kwayo.
Uma singakwazi uzizwe lokho umuntu angakufaki osukwini lwabo nje kuphela, kodwa nolwethu futhi, sinciphisa izenzo zabo zilindelwe ngaphandle kokuncoma, futhi indlela esheshayo yokwenza umuntu asibuke ngokungangabazeki ukubenza bazizwe bengathandwa.
Buyisela
Akunandaba ukuthi umuntu uphana kangakanani futhi uphana kangakanani, wonke umuntu kwesinye isikhathi ulindele ukukwenza thola . Lokhu cishe kuyingxenye yofuzo. Akuyona i-tit for tat, futhi nakanjani akuyona indaba yokugcina amaphuzu. Umuntu anganikeza ukugcotshwa konyawo lwenyanga, kepha ulindele ukubuyiselwa okukodwa. Njalo manje. Kungakuhle.
Noma mhlawumbe batshelwa ukuthi sizokwenza ikhofi ligijime esikhundleni sabo. Okungcono futhi, uma basebenzela umklamo omnandi weklayenti ngenkathi ikati lizungeza izinyawo zabo, sibeka inkomishi yetiye esanda ukwenziwa etafuleni.
Kunezindlela eziningi kakhulu ezincane, ezijabulisayo zokubuyisela izindlela zomunye zomuntu ezincane, ezijabulisayo! Kepha uma sizwa ukuthi lokhu ngandlela thile kuyisidingo esengeziwe emandleni ethu, ukungabi naluzwela kwethu kusibangela ukuthi siwugeje umqondo wesidlo.
Xhuma
Uzwela alugcini ngokunikeza izidingo ezikhulunyiwe noma ezingakhulunywa, kuyindlela yokuqinisa ukuxhumana nesithandwa sethu. Uma kuke kwaba nenhlanhla eyanele yokuba seduze kwezithandani ezihambisana nokugeleza komunye, sizobona umdanso ongabonakali uvela. Bahamba, bacabange, baziphathe futhi balindele ngendlela efudumalisa umoya wethu. Lokhu kumane nje kuvulekele izinkomba zenye. Bayazi imizwa yomunye nomunye abayithokozelayo bobabili beyinjabulo futhi behlinzeka ubumnandi komunye ngisho nangezikhathi zokungajabuli ababonakalayo eziboshiwe ngaphezu kwezindima ezingaphezulu. Lokhu ukuzwelana.
Futhi, kalula nje, uma singeke sixhume ichashazi eliyisisekelo njengokujabulela ubumnandi obutholwa omunye othandweni lwethu, sisele nobudlelwano lapho eyodwa no munye bengenakukwenza ngeqiniso.
Leli khasi liqukethe izixhumanisi ezihambisanayo. Ngithola ikhomishini encane uma ukhetha ukuthenga noma yini ngemuva kokuchofoza kuzo.
