Kungani Ama-Empaths NamaNarcissist Egcina Ebudlelwaneni?

Yimiphi I-Movie Okufanele Uyibone?
 

Kuyethusa impela ukubona ukuthi ama-empaths kanye nama-narcissist agcina kangaki ebudlelwaneni ndawonye.



Ngaphandle kokuthi lezi zinhlobo ezimbili zabantu zisemikhawulweni ephikisanayo yomkhakha wokunakekelwa ngokomzwelo, zibukeka zihlanganisiwe njengamabhubhu emalangabini.

Bobabili bayazi ukuthi izinto zizohamba kabi impela, kodwa nje kubonakala ngathi abazisizi bona.



Yini Ebenza Babumbane?

Lokhu kuhle kakhulu ukuxhomekeka okunobuthi uma kukhulunywa ngobudlelwano. Ama-empaths nama-narcissists empeleni ayizicucu ze-puzzle ezingenampilo komunye nomunye.

Empaths imvamisa inabantu abanomusa ngendlela emangalisayo, abanakekelayo abachuma ngokuthwebula abanye. Babevame ukuphathwa kabi, ukunganakwa, kanye / noma ukunganakwa ebusheni babo, futhi bazame ukunikeza abanye lonke uthando, ukunakekelwa nokunakekelwa ababekudinga kakhulu futhi bengakaze bakuthole.

Ngokulandelayo, abakwa-narcissist badinga ukukhulekelwa nokuphikiswa. Ngokuvamile babephathwa kabi futhi / noma benganakwa ebusheni babo, kwesinye isikhathi baze balahlwe… kepha esikhundleni sokuguqula lobo buhlungu babukhathalele abanye, babujikisa ekutheni bazinakekele kakhulu futhi bazithande ngangokunokwenzeka.

Bona ukuxhumana lapha?

Laba bobabili badonselwa ndawonye noma ngabe bafuna ukuba noma cha. Ziyizibonelo zezingcezu ze-puzzle ezingenampilo, ezinobuthi.

Yini Eyigcina Ihlangene?

Bobabili bayaphumelela emdlalweni, kodwa ngezindlela ezahlukene.

Kaningi, empath iyozizwa ikhululeke kakhulu lapho iphathwa kabi, ngoba leso yisimo abasazi kahle. Bazizwa sengathi bayakwazi abakwenzayo lapho bezama kanzima 'ukuthola' ukunakwa nothando lomunye umuntu.

izinto okufanele wazi ngempilo

Ngokulandelanayo, umugqa odabukisayo we-narcissist uchuma kulokhu kuziphatha. Ngakolunye uhlangothi, bazoba nendelelo ngakho. Bazobona umlingani wabo ebuthakathaka futhi edabukisa, futhi badlale ngemizwa yabo ukuze bahlale bemunca futhi bezama ukuthola uthando nokunakwa.

Bazodlala umdlalo okhohlakele wekati negundane lapho bezo “ ibhomu lothando ”I-empath ngomusa omncane wokubenza bahlanganyele. Ngemuva kwalokho bazogodla futhi ngakho umlingani wabo kufanele ahlasele ukuze athole ukunakekelwa nothando kubo futhi.

Sekukonke, kungukubhangqa okungenampilo okumangalisayo okungaze kuphele kahle.

Kwesinye isikhathi ubudlelwano buphela kusenesikhathi, mhlawumbe ngenxa yokuthi owe-narcissist ubhorekile noma i-empath iye yaba nokuphazamiseka kwemizwa. Uma kunjalo, i-narcissist ngokuyisisekelo izohamba futhi ingalokothi ibheke emuva.

Ngokuphambene nalokho, umfuthwandaba uzozibhidliza iminyaka eminingi, uzwe ukuthi ukube nje babekhombise uthando OLUNINGI, uzwela OLUNINGI, ukunakekelwa OKWENGEZIWE, khona-ke umuntu abazikholisayo ukuthi bayamthanda ngabe uhlala. Futhi okubaluleke kakhulu, ekugcineni ngabe babathanda ngokubuyisela.

Ngokuphambene, i-narcissist akunakwenzeka ukuthi icabange ngayo nhlobo, ukuhlukana kokuthunyelwe. Uma bekwenza, kusho ukuthi ngehlazo lokwedelela ukuthi babebuthaka futhi benosizi kangakanani.

Lapho ama-narcissist kanye ne-empaths bekwazi ukuhlala ndawonye isikhathi eside, imvamisa yingoba sebenze ikhodifomu eqinile. Bondla omunye ngomunye amandla njengama-parasites asontekile, ama-symbiotic. Omunye uphumelela ekukhulekeleni futhi adedele unya, omunye udinga ubudlova ukuqala ukubabazeka kwabo.

Kubuhlungu inhliziyo, akunjalo?

I-Empathic Trauma Bond

Ingabe ujwayelene negama elithi 'isibopho sokuhlukumezeka'? Yinto evame ukuvela ezinganeni ezihlukunyezwa ngabazali bazo.

Ngamagama alula, uhlobo lokunamathiselwa ngokomzwelo lwenziwa ngomjikelezo wokuphathwa kabi nethemba elingamanga. Masisebenzise isibonelo sengane ehlukunyezwa ngumzali we-narcissistic.

Ingane izolimala kakhulu ngumzali, imvamisa ngokuba nesihluku ngokomzwelo, ngamazwi, noma ngokwengqondo. Bazokwehliswa isithunzi futhi batshelwe ukuthi bangelutho lokuthi bangumthwalo, noma bayiziphukuphuku, noma bayiphutha. Ingane izophazamiseka ngokomoya. Konke abakufunayo ukuthi umuntu abamthandayo abakhombise umusa omncane.

Ingane izokwenza konke okusemandleni ayo ukuzama ukuthola ucezu lothando nothando lomzali. Ngakolunye uhlangothi, umzali angabanda futhi aqhelele kude, athuke kakhulu noma abe nonya, ngakho ingane izama kakhulu. Ekugcineni, lowo narcissist uzophenduka futhi athande ukuqhumisa omncane, okugcina kunikeze leyo ngane empofu umzuzu wothando nokuphepha.

Kuze kuphindwe kuhlwithelwe futhi, futhi umjikelezo olimazayo uqala kabusha.

Okufanele kube ukuxhumana okunempilo, nothando phakathi komzali nengane kugcina kungumdlalo owesabekayo lapho amathoyizi e-narcissist nengane khona ukuze athole ukunakwa kanye ne-sycophancy abayifunayo.

wazi nini ukuthi ubudlelwano sebuphelile

Ngokulandelayo, ingane iba nokukhathazeka ngokweqile esimweni somzwelo somzali wayo, ngakho-ke bazokwenza noma yini abangayenza ngothando oluthile.

Laba bantu abasengozini bafunda ukusondelana nalabo abawumthombo wabo wobuhlungu bemizwa nokukhashelwa kwabo, ngoba nje baphoqeleka ukwenza njalo. Kwakudingeka bagebhe futhi bafune umusa omncane ngoba babencike ngokuphelele kubahlukumezi babo kuzo zonke izici zokusekelwa kwabo nenhlalakahle yabo.

Nakanjani bagcina bewuphinda lo mjikelezo ngobungani nangobudlelwano bothando njengoba bekhula. Bazokwakha kabusha izimo abazijwayele ngethemba lokuthi kulokhu, bazothandwa futhi baziswe ngendlela ababehlale befuna ngayo.

Ama-Empaths amaningi ayakubona lokhu, bese ekhetha amaNarcissist noma kunjalo

Ungamangala ukuthola ukuthi izindlela eziningi zazi kahle lokhu kuziphatha, futhi zikhetha ukwehla ngomgwaqo noma kunjalo.

Abanye bayenqaba ukuhlukanisa ubudlelwane nabalingani babo abathandana nabo ngoba bezizwa bebophezelekile kubo ngenxa yomuzwa womsebenzi womndeni. Kungenzeka ukuthi bazikholelisile ukuthi abalingani babo 'babathanda ngempela ekujuleni kwenhliziyo,' ngakho-ke bayaqhubeka bebekezelela ukuhlukunyezwa, noma ngabe bazi kahle kamhlophe ukuthi bayalimala.

Empeleni, abanye baze baqhekeze amahlaya ngomuntu obabiza ngama-narcissist, nokuthi ubudlelwano babo buphuke kanjani ngokwanele ukugcina izinto ziqhubeka. Ngoba ngokusobala lokho kunempilo?

Kunzima kakhulu ukufakaza lolu hlobo lwesimo futhi uzizwe unamandla okubasiza. Lapho ukhathalela umngane noma ilungu lomndeni ngokujulile, futhi ubona ukuthi bahlupheka kangakanani nomlingani / nowakwakhe ongathandeki, ngokungangabazeki ufuna ukubasiza baphume kuleso simo.

Ngenye indlela, uma ungumpath owazi ngokuphelele iqiniso lokuthi ukhethe ukuba nodokotela wezidakamizwa, ungahle udabuke njalo phakathi kwemizwa ehlukile.

Isibonelo, ungahle udelele ukuthi umlingani wakho ukuphatha kanjani, kepha ufuna kakhulu ukubasiza ngoba uyazi ukuthi ubudlwangudlwangu babo busuka endaweni yokulimala okujulile.

ngizwa sengathi ngiyakhala kodwa angikwazi

Kepha bakulimaza kabi, futhi ufuna ukuthi ubuhlungu buphele, kepha uyazi ukuthi ngeke ...

… Ngakho-ke ukuvunguza kugcina ukujikeleza phansi, phansi, phansi kuze kufike ukuwa ekugcineni.

Lokhu kuvunguza kuyabonakala futhi uma kukhulunywa ngezimpaths ezazi ngokuncika kwazo, futhi zifuna ukwesekwa ngakho, kepha empeleni azifuni ukuthatha isinyathelo ukuqeda lesi simo.

Abanye abantu babheka lo mkhuba ngokuthi 'ukubuza.' Uma ungalijwayele leli gama, kuyisimo lapho umuntu ezobuza umbuzo ofanayo kaninginingi, efuna impendulo ethile. Uma bengakutholi abakufunayo, bazokushaya indiva okushiwoyo… kuze kube yisikhathi esilandelayo, lapho bezobuza khona into efanayo ngqo.

Bafuna ukuqinisekiswa nokuqinisekiswa, hhayi iqiniso.

Ngakho-ke ungaba yisiqhwaga esikhononda kabuhlungu kubangani bakho namalungu omndeni wakho ngendlela umlingani wakho abaphatha kabi ngayo. Lapho-ke, futhi nini futhi uma umbuthano wakho wokuxhumana nomphakathi ukubiza ngobudlelwano bakho obungenampilo, ungahle ubathukuthelele. Babe nesibindi esingakanani sokukhuluma ngaleyo ndlela ngomhlukumezi wakho?

Ama-empaths amaningi azovikela umlingani wabo (owahlukumeza ngokuhlukumezayo) esihogweni nasemuva, yize kungababangeli ukuphela kosizi. Bazokusho nokuthi bazi kahle kamhlophe ukuthi umlingani wabo uyahlukumeza, kodwa ukuhlala nabo kuyinto ukukhetha kwabo , futhi kufanele ihlonishwe.

Ekugcineni, bafuna ukusebenzisa umbuthano wabo wezenhlalo njengamahlombe ukukhala ngoba baphathwa kabi, kepha bafuna wonke umuntu akhohlwe konke 'okubi' abakushilo ngokushesha lapho i-Stockholm syndrome yabo ibuyela emuva.

Akunandaba noma ngabe i-narcissist yabo ibenzani, bazoba nencazelo ngakho.

'Akaqondile ukuba nonya, kodwa wakhula kabi kabi…'

'Impela udinga ukunakwa kakhulu, unezinkinga zokulahla…'

'Yebo, uyasishaya futhi angibeke phansi kakhulu, kodwa unezinkinga zempilo…'

Bazothola ukuvikela ngonya umlingani / umhlukumezi wabo uma omunye umuntu esho okuthile okungekuhle ngabo.

Khumbula ukuthi ngaphezu kwakho konke okunye, okudingwa kakhulu ngabakwa-narcissism kulo mhlaba kufanele kukhulekelwe. Ubunjalo babo bokuzicabangela bodwa, obuzimelayo bufihla ukungazethembi kwabo okungakholeki. Kungakho bedinga ukuqinisekiswa njalo nokukhulekelwa kulabo ababazungezile.

Kunini futhi uma behlangabezana nomuntu ongabathandi, abangenakumthakazelisa, noma ongabakhathaleli nhlobo, lokho kungabalimaza kakhulu.

Ngakho-ke baphendukela esilwaneni sabo, bekhala futhi 'besengozini,' futhi umgqigqo wabo ukhahlela ezintanjeni eziphezulu ukuze ubavikele. Bakholelwa ukuthi uma bevikela umuntu obiza ngama-narcissist, lokho kuzobakhombisa ukuthi babathanda kangakanani, futhi nabo bazoboniswa uthando ...

Ngemuva kwakho konke, wonke umuntu angalungiswa, noma aphulukiswe, noma 'asindiswe' ngothando olwanele, ukunakekelwa, nozwela, akunjalo?

izinkondlo ngokulahlekelwa othandekayo ngokuzumayo

Cha.

Lobu budlelwano ngeke bube ngcono

Uma uyi-empath oye wagcina ephindelela ebudlelwaneni obufana nalobu, kuye ngokuthi wena ukushintsha izindlela zakho zokuziphatha.

Umlingani wakho we-narcissistic ngeke aguquke, noma ngabe uphonsa kangakanani ukuqonda, ukubekezela, uthando nokuzinikela kulowo mgodi omnyama.

Ngeke zishintshe ngoba aziboni ukuziphatha kwazo njengokuhlukumeza. Noma ngabe kungenxa yezakhi zofuzo, ukuxhumana kwezinzwa, noma okuhlangenwe nakho kwabo okuyingozi ebuntwaneni, izintambo zabo zinjalo kangangokuba bavame ukuzibona njengezisulu nabafel 'ukholo.

Abakwazi ukuzwa uzwela, futhi kunalokho babona abanye njengezimoto zokufeza izidingo nezifiso zabo.

Impela, abantu abaningi bangashintsha, kepha lokho kwenzeka kuphela lapho benesifiso esijulile sokwenza kanjalo. Kungani omunye umuntu angafaka noma yimiphi imizamo yokushintsha lapho engathembi ngobuqotho ukuthi wenza noma yini engalungile?

Impela: ngeke kwenzeke.

Okokuqala nokubaluleke kakhulu, kubalulekile ukuthi uqonde ukuthi kungani uqhubeka udonseleka kulezi zinhlobo zabantu. Kungokubona kuphela indaba yakho yemvelaphi lapho uzokwazi ukuyiguqula khona.

ukuthi ungamcasula kanjani umuntu othanda ukucasula

Yilapho kusiza khona ngempela ukuzitholela owelapha kahle. Bangakukhombisa ngemibuzo ethile emihle nokuzivocavoca okuzokuvumela ukuthi ubuyele lapho umonakalo wakho uqale khona.

Lapho sikhuluma nalabo bantu abadala okubuhlungu emthonjeni wabo, kudala umthelela ophansi. Ngeke siphulukise ngomlingo ngobusuku obubodwa, kepha kuyamangaza ukuthi i-epiphany yokuthi ukuziphatha okuthile kwaqala kuphi kungabathinta kanjani okwamanje. Lokhu kungaba yiqiniso ngisho emashumini ambalwa eminyaka phansi komugqa.

Lapho umuntu esenalo hlobo olunje lwe-epiphany, angawunqamula umjikelezo.

Eqinisweni, kulula kakhulu ukwenza kanjalo. Lapho ngaphambili, kungenzeka ukuthi wabona umlingani wakho wezidakamizwa njengesihluku sokufakwa amakhodi kanye nomthombo ongafinyeleleki ngokomzwelo ongathola kuwo, manje sezizobukwa ngokucacile.

Kusengaba khona ububele obukhona, ngoba ama-empaths anezimvelo ezikhathalelayo, kepha ngeke uzizwe leso sidingo sokwamukela uthando noma ukwazisa kubo. Futhi ngeke uthintwe yi-barbs kanye ne-jabs yabo. Kuzofana nokubuka ingane iphonsa amatshe entabeni ngomzamo wokuthola ukusabela kuyo noma ukuyilimaza.

Uma ufika kulelo qophelo, umbulali ngeke abe namandla kuwe. Uzoba nekhono lokuzikhulula kubo, ngaphandle kobuhlungu obuhlala isikhathi eside bokuzibuza ukuthi ngabe kukhona okunye okungenzeka ukwenzile ukubenza bakuthande.

Uzokwazi ukuqala kabusha, wazi ukuthi umjikelezo webhizinisi lokuhlukumezeka okungenampilo usuphelile. Futhi awusoze waba nobuhlobo nomuntu osebenzisa izihibe futhi.

Namanje awuqiniseki ukuthi kungani ukhangwa ama-narcissists noma ukuthi ungayeka kanjani ukuwawela? Khuluma nomelaphi namuhla ongakudlulisa kule nqubo. Mane uchofoze lapha ukuxhuma nenye.

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