Akuwona wonke ama-narcissist adalwe alingana. Njengoba kulula njengokupenda bonke ngebhulashi elifanayo, lokhu kuphazamiseka kobuntu okuyinkimbinkimbi kungachazwa njengokuthambekele okuningi kunohlobo olulodwa, olungaguquki, olungaguquguquki.
Lokhu kuletha inkinga yokuthi ungazibona kanjani futhi uphendule kuzo ukuhlukunyezwa kwe-narcissistic lokho kungahle kudidaniswe nobudlelwano bakho obujwayelekile (futhi ngenxa yalokho obamukelekayo emphakathini) obunamandla.
Le ndlela elinganiselayo ye-narcissism ivame ukuba nobuqili futhi ingatholakali kalula, kanti ngenkathi kulimala ngokwengqondo isisulu kungenzeka kube nzima kakhulu, noma kunjalo ikhona.
Ngakho-ke umbona kanjani umuntu olungisa izinto ngokulingene? Bahluke kanjani kwabanye abakwa-narcissist kanye nomuntu wakho ojwayelekile ongahlushwa yilesi sifo?
okufanele ukwenze uma uwedwa ekhaya
Ukuntula Uzwela Vs Ukunganakwa Okuphelele Kwemizwa
Imizwa evela ngaphandle ku-narcissist (okungukuthi leyo yabanye abantu) ibonwa njengezinto zangaphandle ngokuphelele. Abezizwe bathanda olunye ulimi ngaphandle kolimi lwebele - izinto ezicishe zingaqondakali ngomqondo wokuthi azibonakali futhi azinampilo.
Lokhu kungenxa yokuthi bonke abakwa-narcissist abanalo uzwela lokungena ezicathulweni zomunye futhi babone imicabango nemizwa abangaba nayo. Kukhona, noma kunjalo, izindlela ezahlukahlukene abangasondela ngazo kulezizidumbu zabokufika.
Ekugcineni okukhulu kakhulu, umuntu osebenzisa izihibe angayinaki ngokuphelele imizwa yabanye, akholelwe ukuthi ayibalulekile futhi ayinamphumela ezenzweni zakhe noma kumphumela awufisayo. I-narcissist elinganiselayo ngokwengeziwe, esikhundleni salokho, izoliqonda iqiniso lokuthi imizwa enjalo ikhona futhi ingaguqula indlela yayo yokuziphatha iye kwabanye okuncane degree, kepha ngeke bakwazi ukuqonda umthombo noma incazelo yalokhu kusabela.
Lapho bona uqobo lwabo bengumthombo, ngeke bakwazi ukuthola indima abayidlalile, ngakho-ke noma ngabe ulimele, uthukuthele, udidekile, noma uyesaba, bazogcina ubumsulwa babo ngaso sonke isikhathi. Kuyindaba 'yemizwa yakho, inkinga yakho.'
Impendulo yabo ingabonakala njengenhliziyo ebandayo noma ekude. Izenzo zabo zihambisana kakhulu nokuzwela kunokuzonda kwangaphandle.
Qaphela Intukuthelo Engunaphakade
Lapho siphatheke kabi, cishe akunakugwenywa ukuthi sibe nemizwa ethile yentukuthelo, kepha lokhu kuyaphela ngokuhamba kwesikhathi njengoba sixola futhi, ngezinga elithile, sikhohlwa.
Ngakolunye uhlangothi, i-narcissist elinganiselayo, izobamba igqubu - futhi nomfana uzokwazi ngakho. Lapho bekolunye lwezimo zabo, zilungele ukubaphakamisa ubuqili obudlule ngomthwalo wamabhakede. Yonke into encane owake wayenza ukuze ungaziphathi kahle izombiwa futhi ijikijelwe njengemicibisholo emincane, eyenzelwe ukulimaza imizwa ezindaweni zesiteleka senhliziyo nengqondo yakho.
Basebenzisa leli qhinga njengendlela yokuzivikela ekugxekeni ukugxekwa kude nabo futhi bakukhanyisele ngokubabonisa ngisho nokulwa nesibindi sabo. Ngenkathi ama-narcissist alinganiselayo ethambekele izikhathi zokuguquguquka , ngokunokwenzeka bazokwamukela ukuphikisana kunethoni enolaka ngokweqile.
I-egos yabo ngeke nje ibavumele bathethelele futhi bakhohlwe njengabantu abavuthiwe ngokwengeziwe emoyeni, ngokwengxenye ngoba babheka wonke amagqubu amancane njengendlela yokubakhulula kunoma ikuphi ukungalungi esikhathini esizayo (isb. “Awukwazi ukungithukuthelela ngo-X, wenze u-Y no-Z esikhathini esedlule - uzenzisi ”).
Bazonda Ukulahlekelwa
AmaNarcissist ayizidalwa ezincintisana kakhulu futhi ngokujwayelekile azokholelwa ukuthi zinhle ezintweni eziningi. Banobuciko kakhulu kunawe, banobuciko obuthe xaxa, banolwazi oluthe xaxa ngezindaba zomhlaba… heck, noma kukhulunywa ngekhishi, izidlo zabo zokuwosa ziyizandla ezinhle kakhulu ozoba nazo.
Kuphela, abakwazi njalo ukuba yinja ephezulu kukho konke. Lapho likhula izinga le-narcissism, kuzoba nzima kubo ukwamukela lokhu. I-narcissist elinganiselayo ivamise ukuba nokungenani okuncane okugxilwe ezingqondweni zabo ukuze kusetshenziswe ngezikhathi ezithile, futhi bakusebenzisa ngobuhlakani ukuze bazibeke njengabahamba phambili emiphakathini ethile.
Bangaba ababukeka kahle kakhulu ngeminyaka yabo, isidlali seHockey esihle kakhulu eqenjini labo, umuntu ohlakaniphe kunabo bonke bake bahlangane , noma ube nendlu enkulu kunazo zonke phakathi kwabo bonke abangane babo. O, futhi bangcono kunawe (umlingani wabo / osebenza naye / umngane / ilungu lomndeni) ngazo zonke izindlela ongazicabanga.
Bacelwe ukuthi baziklelise ngokumelene nanoma isiphi isici esihle, abasoze bashelela ngaphansi kwe-8 - qhathanisa lokhu nabanye abakwa-narcissist izinkohliso zobukhulu Kusho ukuthi bayenqaba ukusuka ku-10 kungakhathalekile ukuthi kukalwa ini. Abangewona ama-narcissist, esikhundleni salokho, bazokwamukela ukuthi bahle ngandlela thile, kepha empeleni balinganiselwa kokunye.
Futhi uma kungenzeka ushaye i-narcissist elinganiselayo emdlalweni noma emncintiswaneni, ungaqiniseka ukuthi bazobe bekulungele ngezaba zokuthi ukwenze kanjani lokho (umdlalo wawuboshiwe, wakhohlisa, baphazanyiswa, angizizwa kahle). Bazokusho nganoma yini ukuze bakubeke phansi futhi bakugcine kulokho abakubona kuyindawo yakho efanelekile.
Okunye ukufunda okubalulekile nge-narcissism (i-athikili iyaqhubeka ngezansi):
- AmaMaski ayisi-6 amaNarcissist angagqoka (nokuthi ungawabeka kanjani)
- ICovert Narcissist: Izinhlobo Ezinamahloni, Ezingenisiwe Zingaba Narcissists Kanjani
- Ukususwa komuntu: Indlela YamaNarcissists Nama-Sociopaths Ukuphatha kabi Abanye
- Izinto eziyi-8 i-Narcissist Angeke ikwenzele zona (Noma Noma ngubani Omunye)
- Izindlela Zokubhekana Nesimo Lapho Ushiya Umlingani We-Narcissistic Ngemuva
- Amanye amagama angama-6 avela kusichazamazwi seNarcissist Okudingeka Ukwazi Ngempela
Ubalinga Kanjani Ukubabuza?
Noma yini umuntu osho nge-narcissist akushoyo, kuyiqiniso. Kodwa-ke benza, kulungile. Okungenani, leyo yindlela ababona ngayo.
Ngendlela efanayo lapho i-narcissist izonda ukwehlulwa, abakwazi ukuyimela lapho umuntu eveza imibono ephikisana neyakhe. Bazophikisana baze baluhlaza ebusweni ukuze baqinisekise umbono wabo ngaphezu kwabo bonke abanye.
Manje, uJoe wakho ojwayelekile uzokwazi ukulalela amaphuzu ashiwo abanye futhi awahloniphe, noma ngabe angavumelani nawo. Bangaze bathonywe yingxabano yomuntu othile uma icatshangwe kahle ngokwanele.
kungani ngincela yonke into
Abaningi bama-narcissist bazophendula ngokuhlasela ngokumelene 'nomphikisi' wabo ukuze baqede ukufaneleka kwempikiswano eyenziwa. Bazophonsa ukuthuka komuntu siqu futhi babuze yonke imininingwane emincane ukuphoqa omunye umuntu ukuba angene emuva. Bangaphinde basebenzise ulimi olunolaka nokwenza izitho zomzimba ukuze babonise ukubusa kwabo kunoma ngubani ofuna ukuphonsela inselelo ukubusa kwabo.
Ezingeni elilinganiselwe ngokwengeziwe, i-narcissist izomane inganaki noma yisiphi isitatimende esiphikisana nombono waso njengokushaywa ngokuphelele. Bahlasela okuncane futhi baphambuke kakhulu, befuna ukunganaki kunokuzibandakanya. Ngale ndlela, bangaqhubeka nokubeka umbono wabo futhi benze ngendlela ababona ngayo ngaphandle kokubhekana nokukhathazeka kwabanye. Yibize ngekhanda lengulube, yibize ngenkani, ikubize ngokuthanda kwakho i-crux yalolu daba awuvunyelwe ukuba nemibono engahambisani neyabo.
Ukusolwa Kunqamule E-Paranoia
AbakwaNarcissists abayithembi imiphefumulo. Babheka abantu abaningi ngamehlo asolisayo njengokungathi bahlala beqaphele noma yiliphi igama noma isenzo esingabekela ukuphakama kwabo.
Lapho lokhu kuphuma esandleni, bangagcina sebengenwe wumbono ophelele, bakholelwa ukuthi abanye benza ngezindlela zokubahlasela noma ukubacekela phansi - noma kungekho zenzo ezinjalo ezenzekayo. Cabanga ngemigqa yokukholelwa ukuthi umuntu osebenza naye uhlela ukubatholela isaka noma umlingani unecala elingemthetho ngemuva kwabo.
Ngokuvamile le paranoia izibonakalisa njengendlela elawula impilo. Bafuna ukulawula izingxoxo ukuvimbela ukuthi kungenzeka (ezingqondweni zabo) ukuhlaselwa ngamazwi. Uma abanye bevele benengxoxo, bazohamba baphazamise ukuze bathole ukuthi bathini (uma kwenzeka kukhona okubi ngabo). Bazofuna ukuba kuyo yonke imihlangano yomsebenzi noma okungenani bathole phansi lokho okwashiwo ngemuva kwalokho.
ukuthi ungaqhamuka kanjani neqiniso elimnandi ngawe
Bazogcina umlingani wabo eseduze ngawo wonke umzuzu wokuqinisekisa ukuthi abanalo ithuba lokungathembeki. Bangabashayela njalo ngemizuzu engu-30 ukubheka ukuthi bakuphi, benzani, nokuthi banobani. Bangase bafune nokufaka isoftware ezingcingweni zabo noma kumadivayisi ezimotweni zabo ukulandelela konke abakwenzayo.
Abangewona ama-narcissist nabo banokungazethembi kwabo futhi lokhu, ngokwesibonelo, kungaholela emicabangweni yokukhaphela noma ukwehluleka, kepha imvamisa ihlala isikhathi esifushane. Ukuqhubekela phambili ngakwisibonisi se-narcissistic oya kuso, kulapho umuntu ethanda ukuphamba nokulawula. Ezingeni elilinganisiwe ungalindela okunye okungenhla, esinye isikhathi.
Kukhanya Okuncane “Kugesi”
Inkulumo ethi ukukhanyisa ngegesi yinto esiyichazile futhi sayichaza kwenye indatshana, futhi, ngamafuphi, ibhekisa kwinqubo esetshenziswa ngabakwa-narcissist ukudida nokuxaka isisulu sabo ngokubenza bangabaze imicabango kanye nezinkumbulo zabo.
Le ndlela ingalimaza ngesihluku, kepha iphumelele ukugoba omunye umuntu entandweni yakhe. Umuntu one-narcissism elinganiselayo uzosebenzisa ukukhanyisa igesi , kodwa bangakwenza lokhu ngezinga elincane noma ezimweni ezingazodwa kunokuqeda ngokuphelele ukuzethemba kwakho.
Bazoguqula isihloko ukuze bagweme ukugxekwa, baphikelele ekutheni izinkumbulo zabo zomcimbi yizona ezifanele, futhi baveze imizwa yabo yomona nokungazethembi kuwe. Cabanga ngakho njenge-gaslighting-lite: isakhohlisayo, kepha isetshenziswe kaningi nokuningi ukukhulisa ama-egos abo kunokuba yehlise isithunzi sakho.
I-narcissism, njengoba sike saxoxa, ukuphazamiseka okungahluka ngobukhulu. I- amasu okukhohlisa esetshenziswa ngama-narcissist alinganiselayo ajwayelekile, kepha ahlukile kubuningi bawo nobudlova. Izimpawu ezichazwe ngenhla zingasiza ekuboneni labo abanezinhlobo ezimbi ze-narcissism - labo abangaphezu kokuzikhukhumeza okuncane, kepha badlulele ngokweqile kunezinhlamvu ze-psychopathic ekugcineni kobubanzi.
Kubalulekile ukukhumbula, noma kunjalo, ukuthi ukuhlukunyezwa kusesekuhlukunyezwa, noma ngabe kungagcini ngokusobala njengoba kungenzeka. Isimo esilawulayo nesikhohlisayo salaba bantu sisho ukuthi nakanjani bazobunqanda ubuntu bakho bemvelo kungakhathalekile ukuthi bangalinganisela kangakanani - ezingeni elithile noma kwelinye, uzolahlekelwa yingxenye yokuthi ungubani uma uhlala ubambeke komunye isikhathi eside kakhulu.
Uke wahlangana nomuntu olingana nomthethosivivinywa njenge-narcissist elinganiselayo? Yikuphi kulezi zibonakaliso okungukupha okukhulu kakhulu kokuhlangenwe nakho kwakho? Shiya amazwana ngezansi ukuze wabelane ngomcabango wakho kanye nokuhlangenwe nakho kwakho nabanye.
