Kungenzeka ukuthi awukaze uqaphele, kepha izwe laseNtshonalanga libonakala lisenkingeni yokuwohloka kwemizwa okuhlangene.
Nomaphi lapho uphendukela khona, abantu bahlushwa ukukhathazeka okucindezelayo nokudangala, abanye baze bafike ezingeni lokuthi bakhubazeke ngokuphelele. Lokhu kubayekisa ukuhola noma yikuphi ukufana kwempilo 'ejwayelekile'.
Esinye sezici ezibambe iqhaza kokukhathazeka okukhulu ukuthi abantu, bebonke, bafuna ukwazi ukuthi baphephile futhi bavikelekile, futhi noma yini esongela indawo yabo yokunethezeka izobenza batatazele.
Inkinga lapha, yiqiniso, ukuthi izindawo zokududuza ziyinkohliso.
Azikho izinhlelo ezizoke zenzeke ngendlela esifuna ukuba zenzeke ngayo, futhi ukuzama ukulawula izinto ezahlukahlukene ukuze kulondolozwe umuzwa wokuthi 'uphephile' futhi ujabule kuzoholela ekudumaleni.
Uma ungumuntu othanda ukuphatha yonke imininingwane emincane empilweni, okulandelayo kungakusiza ukuthi ucabange futhi.
Uma Ufuna Ukwenza Onkulunkulu Bahleke, Batshele Izinhlelo Zakho
Ngabe wake waba nohlelo olusebenze njengoba ubucabanga? Noma bekuhlale kunezimo ezingalindelekile obekufanele ubhekane nazo lapho zivela?
Ungahle ube nezindaba ezihlasimulisayo ongazilandisa ngezikhathi ozihambile, noma ngabe yinkampani yezindiza elahlekelwa yimpahla yakho, noma ukugula ngamandla ngenxa yezimbaza ezithile ezingathandeki.
Noma mhlawumbe umzuzu wothando waphazanyiswa iphela elilingana ne-cocker spaniel eligxuma ngomdlandla kulo lonke elalisembhedeni.
Lokho kusho, lolo hambo olufanayo kungenzeka ukuthi lwalugcwele izikhathi ezinhle ezikugcwalisa ngentokozo nenjabulo, akunjalo?
Ukube ubusazi kusengaphambili ngezinto ezixakile ezizokwenzeka, ngabe wake wahambela noma ikuphi kwasekuqaleni?
Ukunamathela Ku-Illusion Of Control Kungakugulisa (Futhi Kuphazamise Ubudlelwano Bakho)
Isifiso sokuba sezweni eliphephile nelingalindeleka singenza abantu baziphathe ngezindlela ezinamandla nezingaguquguquki.
Kwabanye abantu, lokhu kungabonakala ngokulawula ngokweqile abanye abantu ezimpilweni zabo ngakho-ke amazwi nezenzo zabo azibangeli ukumangala noma ukungaphatheki kahle.
Izimo ezinjenge-obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) zingavela lapho abantu bezizwa sengathi abanakho ukulawula okuningi ngempilo yabo njengoba bengathanda.
Ngakho-ke kunalokho, bazama ukulawula ngokuphelele izinto ezincane ezibazungezile… njengokuhlela izinongo zabo zokupheka ngama-alfabethi, noma ngokufaka amapeni namapensela emigqeni ecocekile.
Lokhu kungahle kuthobeke okwamanje, kepha uma wenza izinto ezinjengalezi futhi uklabalasa umlingani wakho noma izingane ngokuphazamisa i-oda, lokho kudala umonakalo omkhulu.
Ngokufanayo, lapho abantu bezizwa bengenakho ukulawula ezindaweni ezahlukahlukene zokuphila kwabo, bangaba nenkinga yokudla. Ngemuva kwakho konke, uma ungakwazi ukulawula noma yini enye, ungalawula okwenzayo (noma ongakudli), akunjalo?
Lapho abantu bebambelela kokuzithoba - okwamanje ukuzilimaza - imikhuba efana nalena ukuze ucime ukukhathazeka ngoshintsho , bayazilimaza emazingeni amaningi kakhulu.
Ukuphazamiseka okufana nalokhu kubanga umonakalo emzimbeni nasengqondweni, futhi njengoba kuzohlala kukhona amathonya aphazamisayo, ngisho nomzamo wokulawula izinto ezincane ungacekelwa phansi.
Lokho kuzodala ukuthi ukukhathazeka kukhuphuke okungenza imikhuba yomuntu yokuzithambisa idlulele ngokweqile.
Ukuba nengcindezi nokukhathazeka ngaso sonke isikhathi kulimaza izingxenye ezingenakubalwa zomzimba wakho kanye nengqondo yakho. Ubufakazi balokhu sebumangalisa kakhulu.
Ukuzama ukulawula okungalawuleki nakho ukukhipha ngendlela emangalisayo . Ukuhlala uqaphile njalo ukuze usabele kuzaps ezingalindelekile ezikukhipha amandla akho futhi zikuyekise ukujabulela umzuzu.
Ungahle uthande (i-athikili iyaqhubeka ngezansi):
- Ukulinganisela Indawo Yangaphakathi Yangaphandle Yokulawula: Ukuthola Indawo Emnandi
- Ungabhekana Kanjani Ne-Control Freak Ekuphileni Kwakho
- Izinhlobo Ezi-8 Zokulawula Abantu Ongase Uhlangane Nabo Empilweni
- Izinto ezi-3 Okungafanele Uzibekezelele Ekulawuleni Abazali
- Imikhuba engu-8 Yabantu Abakwaziyo Ukuzimela
Ushintsho Nobuhlungu Akunakugwenywa. Ukuhlupheka Kuyakhethwa.
Enye yezinto eziphambili izinkolelo zefilosofi yamaBuddha ukuthi okuwukuphela kwento ekhona endaweni yonke inguquko.
Ngokuvamile, abantu abaluthandi ushintsho. Bathanda izindawo ezinethezekile ezifudumele, lapho bephethe khona, futhi bavikelekile… okungafani neze nezwe elikhulu, elisabekayo, elithanda ukusiphonsa kuma-curveball kuthi lapho besingalindele khona.
Akunandaba ukuthi sizama kanzima kangakanani, asisoze, SONKE sikwazi ukulawula izici zokuthola izizathu ezimpilweni zethu. Hhayi ukuziphatha kwabanye abantu (ngoba lokho kungumashiqela ohlukumezayo ngokomzwelo), hhayi ithrafikhi, hhayi isimo sezulu.
Konke kuguquka ngokungaguquguquki, kwesinye isikhathi kwehle isigqoko.
Uma ucabanga ukuthi uzozizwa wanelisekile ngempilo yakho inqobo nje uma ulawula konke okuguqukayo, uphokophele ukuhlala isikhathi eside egumbini elincane lapho ugqoke i-ensemble enemikhono emide kakhulu ekwazi ukusonga.
Nguwe Ongazikhethela
Sonke sinokuzikhethela uma kukhulunywa ngokuthi sibucubungula kanjani ubunzima nokungaphatheki kahle ezimpilweni zethu, futhi izinqumo esizenzayo zinquma ukuthi singakwazi yini ukuhlangabezana noshintsho nobunzima ngamandla nangomusa, noma siwohloke.
Futhi kuyisinqumo.
KONKE ukukhetha.
ukubhalela umuntu omthandayo incwadi
Eqinisweni, ukukhetha okwenzayo empilweni kuvame ukufika lapho ulawula khona. Lapho sekwenziwe ukhetho, ezinye izinto ezihlukile ongazilawula ziqala ukuthonya indlela ohamba ngayo.
Ungakhetha ukuqala ukuzama ingane nomlingani wakho, kepha awukwazi ukulawula ngokunembile lapho - noma noma ngabe - ukhulelwa.
Ungakhetha ukubhala inoveli, kodwa awukwazi ukulawula ukuthi ngabe umshicileli uzoyithanda yini noma izothengisa kakhulu yini.
Ungakhetha ukufunda umlando wasendulo wamaGrikhi eyunivesithi, kepha awukwazi ukulawula ukuthi isikhala somsebenzi wamaphupho wakho singavuleka nini futhi kuphi noma uzoba ngumfakisicelo ophumelelayo uma kwenzeka.
Wena can , noma kunjalo, khetha ukuyeka isidingo sakho sokulawulwa okuphelele kokuguquguqukayo kwempilo.
Uma ungaqala ukubona ukuthi nini yenza ube nokulawula okuthile nokuthi nini ungenzi , ungagwema ukukhathazeka okukhulu nokukhathazeka.
Noma njengoba uSteve Maraboli ekubeka:
Ushintsho olungakholeki lwenzeka empilweni yakho lapho uthatha isinqumo sokulawula lokho okwenzayo yenza ube namandla ngaphezu kokulangazelela ukulawula lokho wena ungenzi. '
Futhi khumbula ...
Uma uzizwa ngokweqiniso ukuthi awuyilawuli imicabango yakho mayelana nalokhu - ikakhulukazi uma wena uzizwe uvalelekile ngabo - bese ubheka uhlobo oluthile lokwelulekwa ukukusiza ngalo.
Abelaphi bazi zonke izinhlobo zamathiphu namasu angakusiza uzikhulule ekuhlushweni yingqondo yakho.
